Beautiful Trauma

12

Chaeyoung's POV

"What are you doing?" I snarled at him as I follow him to his office, my ears red from embarrassment and my blood fueled with anger and frustration. 

He was there, sitting on his mighty chair, staring at me with an amused expression on his face. 

I admit he looked really good sitting on his chair like that. The confident smirk showing on his face is even too much to handle and I had to fight hard to restrain myself from lunging into him. 

My mind remembers... Those touches, the kiss, every single thing that had happened that night I was hugging him to sleep. I remember when I saw his eyes.

I remember. And I feel so stupid for being weak. I have been stupid before because of him, why do I have to fall back to that same blackhole again?

I shouldn't be allowing myself to fall deeply when I know all of this is messed up.

Stop it, Chaeyoung. You're not that desperate. Please. 

"What? I didn't do anything?" he said before grabbing his phone which was resting on the top of his table, completely ignoring my presence.

He was smiling while checking out his phone and I honestly don't know if he was mocking me while feigning ignorance or he was just a complete jackass, either way, he is still a horrible person for doing this to me. 

The nerve of this guy.

"Why did you say those words? And why the fuck does your friend knows about my past? Aren't you being too much?" I asked him, my voice starting to shake. 

All the hate that I had for him from a few years back boiling within me. The air stuck in my lungs feels like being sucked up into nothingness and all I can see are dots on my eyes with spots I knew I'm seeing due to the overwhelming emotion that I'm forcefully into.

Are they making fun of me right now? 

"He's my friend, a very close one. You don't have to worry about him," he stated and I growled in anger. 

"He already created a ruckus. Including you!" I said, pointing a finger at him. "What right do you have to do that to me, huh?" I don't care if I am sounding overly dramatic about it but this is starting to kill me. 

They are playing with my emotions and I can't let them do that. 

My pride is the only thing that's left in me. At least let me have that.

I look at him with disdain and his brows furrowed. 

Before I can even stop myself, I started spatting words my angry self wanted to say to him. 

"I hate you. I hate your guts.," I gritted my teeth in anger. "I hate that you came back here. I hate everything that involves you," I added. 

"I hate that you have something against me and I can't do anything about it, " My body is shaking in anger and he angrily stood up from his seat. 

"Stop, Chaeyoung. Let's not hurt each other through words," his face is dark and I know he's already angry. 

But I don't care. I am angry too. Does his anger the only thing that matters? 

The scar in my heart seemed fresh again at this point and scars don't easily heal. It leaves a mark that sometimes, even time isn't enough to let it fade.