Porcelain

Chapter 10

I'm here, once again, to bless you with a brand new chapter! Thanks for 160 reads, can't thank you enough! Hope you'll like this one as well and please don't be a silent reader ~

Chapter 10

"So, what'd you wanna talk about?" We were now sitting on the grass leaning against a tree and I heard Josiah sigh.

"Except our name" he let a small grin portray his face for a short while "have you ever wondered why we became who we are?" I hesitated with an answer since I didn't understand what he meant so he simply continued.

"Why we're not jocks running around on some stupid meaningless court worrying about which cheerleaders are watching." I furrowed my eyebrows and gave an expression of incredulity in response.

"You mean why you're instead running around controlling the streets and beating people up for adrenaline?" He laughed loudly and shook his head. "I guess that thought hasn't crossed my mind yet. Just thought you weren't hot enough for being in the popular crew or something." A jokingly chuckle escaped me and the same for Josiah. "But no I honestly haven't thought about it."

I started plucking out grass and fiddled it between my fingers while he continued.

"Well, then I guess you'll get this convo for free." As he spoke I got sucked in more and more with his voice that carried so many secrets all at once.

"You know how kids can get when they're young. Push other classmates around for mundane things, say ugly words to one another because they're proud they know something you don't. Stuff like that. We then took it to another level." A sad expression rested on his face that showed that he wasn't exactly proud of his previous actions.

"We didn't stop, we just grew stronger as did our actions. Instead of pushes, we punched, and instead of ugly words we blackmailed and... I guess the switch flipped when Axton's brother died." A part of me wanted to comfort him but my inability to actually do so had me silent.

"I think it was about three years ago and one day we got a picture of Noah lying at the bottom of a cliff with a text saying that a dead body was the result of stepping up against them."

A gentle shook with his head and a heaved sigh showed devastation. "I don't think killing Noah was Havoc's intention but after their apparent fight and what I think was an accident they had to choose between apologizing or showing off, and we all know what they decided to embrace. Then there was no turning back."

His glassy eyes stared into emptiness in front of him and I realized how bad I am at consoling people. But after a while of staying quiet, I spoke up, a now obvious and relevant statement.

"I didn't know Axton had a brother." Joshias sadly smiled as if remembering something important.

"After he got killed Axton threw away everything that Noah possessed even his school textbooks." A humorless laugh escaped his lips. "He never talks about him and wants to keep it that way, the few times he has come up in our conversations Axton has disappeared for days on end. I hope you understand that you have to stay low on this information, especially around him but I wanted you to understand one thing out of this. " He looked me directly in the eyes and I nodded.

"That thing is, we don't have a reason for what we do I didn't go to the juvenile at first place for, I don't know, protecting someone close to me nor myself."

"You got caught before?" There was no surprise that WU all had done something to end up in jail but that the fact that they'd actually been busted before caught me off guard.

"Yes, got released one month ago actually. What I meant to say is that I did it because I was, am hella selfish. I was pissed off 'cause there was a scratch on my car and at that moment, on my way home, someone accidentally bumped into me and I snapped. Just because of a finger long scratch on my car two young kids never got to see their father on his legs again. He got paralyzed, waist and down, due to me ruining his spine. And I didn't have an explanation for it, not everyone has."

When Josiah offered me a ride on his bike he'd told me about his black SUV that wasn't quite polished yet, hence his other way of transportation. His apologetic words regarding a lift on a relatively small motorcycle didn't spare me a second thought back then but now it suddenly crossed my mind.

"But-"

"Becka, this isn't some Oliver Twist who stole food to survive. We all have different backgrounds but everything we did was for fun." He spat the words out in disgust. "We ruined lives for mere seconds of some shitty happiness." A long and heavy breath escaped him. "All I want to say is that I have no idea what you've been through. But even if your situation is because of you, though I'm not saying it is, we're not the ones to judge. You shouldn't have to face your fears by yourself no matter non existing reason or not."

On my shoulder was a warm hand now placed but was soon gone when Josiah decided to walk back in again.

"Wait!" He stopped in his tracks and slowly turned around. "I wasn't locked behind bars in that way you seem to think. But the truth is, bad things don't affect us profoundly as we expect them to. That's true of good things, too. We adapt very quickly to either." I walked closer to him and looked him deep in his eyes.

"Your reason might not have been clear but it's there. Invisibility means that opportunities for creative research are infinite. You don't have no reason, you have an infinite. I don't defend your actions 'cause I don't agree with them. But every student has a teacher and I'm sorry to ruin your perfect bubble but you didn't destroy that much on your own."

With my elbow I nudged him and smiled playfully. "You're not as good as you think you are." Then I walked inside, leaving him dumbfounded.

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