The lost kardashian

Interviews

I woke up to see mom sitting at the edge of my bed.

-Goodmorning sunshine, she said and smiled, I noticed  the smile was fake though.

-Morning, why are you here? I asked and tried not to sound too rude.

-I thought we could have a little talk.

-About what? I asked even though I knew exactly what she was talking about.

-I know you threw up your food yesterday. Demi told me, why did you do it? You are so beautiful just the way you are.

You see? You're beautiful now when you are starving yourself. Don't you dare stop. They didn't have to tell me twice, I wasn't planning on stopping.

-Yeah, it just got to much with you guys knowing about..you know.. so I kind of freaked out. It's nothing I do often at all I swear, I had two years without throwing up and then I relapsed but it won't happened again. And thank you. I said and smiled. I was telling her the truth so she better believe me. 

-Okay, I believe you. But I think you should go to therapy anyways, you might not need it for issues with food but growing up in the spotlight can be hard too.

-I don't want to. I will just tell you if something is wrong instead, please. 

-Okay, for now. But then you have to tell me if you're struggling with something.

-Promise! I said and hugged her.

-Breakfast ready in 10! She said and walked out

The word breakfast made me feel sick, but I know that if I mess up this meal I will have to go to theraphy. I washed my face and changed into some new clothes and went down to eat breakfast.

-Oh it's pancakes! I said and smiled. 

Don't eat. I have to. Throw up later. I can't. Cut. Okay. I made a deal with my demons.

-Yes, I know you love pancakes!

We started to eat.

-Does it happens anything special today? I asked. 

-You're kidding me right?

-No? 

-You have an interview on the Ellen show, and good morning America today,

-Alone or with somebody else? And when? 

-Just you. And you're having good morning America at 12 and Ellen show at 3 pm. I will drive you as soon as you're done with your breakfast and have changed into other clothes. Mario is already there.

-Okay, I will go change now, I said and walked upstairs to my room.  

Don't forget about us, go cut. 

I had really bad anxiety over the pancakes so I listened, again, as usual. 

The arms, you wasn't planning on showing them anyways right? They are so fat.

That hit me hard, so I listened. I cut myself on one of my arms and instantly regretted it. I won't be able to wear short sleeves ever again. At least not the next years. And it's summer. Fuck. 

-Kenza we have to go! My mom yelled from downstairs.

-Coming! My voice didn't sound as steady as I hoped.

I put on a long sleeved crop top with a pair of light, high waisted jeans and walked downstairs.

Time skip to the Ellen show:

We talked, laughed and just had a great time until this one question came.

-So, many celebrities, especially those who grew up on the spotlight, have struggled with mental health issues. Do you struggle with anything? Or how do you do to stay healthy?

-Uhm, yeah, many people suffer from different mental illnesses, and since celebrities are just as human as non-celebrities they suffer too. But I feel great, I'm very happy with my life and myself, and I just feel great over all. And to be healthy I workout a lot, I sleep at least 7 hours a night, and I make sure that I'm not too stressed or something. I basically just take care of myself, and I think everybody else should too, I said and everybody applauded. 

I felt disgusted by myself for answering like that. I was lying straight up to their faces and I didn't enjoy it at all.

-Yes, everybody should take care of themselves and just love themselves. That's really important. Do you have tip to anyone struggling with something?

-I don't think I'm the right person to ask that since I have never really struggled with myself and any mental illness, of course I feel down sometimes but it's never something very serious you know. But I think that's it important to tell people about your issues so that they can help you. I would definitely do that if I was struggling with something. And when I do feel a little down I tell someone. 

-Yes, that's a very good tip. Do you have like a role model that you look up to?

-Yes, of course I do. I really look up to everybody in my family.

-That's really sweet. We don't have much time left but I want to ask you one more question.

And then we talked, and the interview was over. I walked off stage and the person I saw backstage was not the person I expected. It was Demi lovato, I guess she was the next guest. 

Demi's pov:

Kenza came off stage. I heard her interview and gosh, it was killing me. She lies so like me. I could tell she wasn't too happy with seeing me.

-Hi.. she said

-How are you doing? I asked and gave her a small smile

-Good, how about you? I ignored her question.

-We both know that's a lie. I heard your interview and I get that you lie to the media, that's fine. But you can't lie to yourself. You're worth so much and you really deserve to be happy.

-Aw, thank you. But I'm doing okay, really! I just had one relapse, but I keep fighting. 

-Okay, just keep fighting. And listen to your own advice, tell people if you're struggling with something. I putted my hand on her harm to show her my support and she winced.

-Omg sorry, are you okay?

-Yeah, everything is fine, she said and smiled. I could tell it was a lie. What if she's cutting? Okay I can't be that suspicious, I have just met this girl twice. She might just have a bruise or something. 

-Demetria you have to go on stage! My assistant said for like the fifth time.

I hugged her and went on stage.