I hate you, I love you - Simbar (Completed)

Part 18.2

Ámbar's POV

"What had the most impact that day was that my mother showed up. My biological mother... She came to tell me I wasn't Sol Benson. That Sharon was lying to everyone and specially me. I didn't believe her and didn't want to listen to anything she had to say... But she knew about my birthmark. And deep down I knew I wasn't Sol Benson things didn't add up, they didn't make sense. That was the day I found out I wasn't Sol Benson... The day I realized I didn't know who I was..."

I ramble this last part, speaking faster to try and avoid thinking too much about it or bring all of those terrible feelings back.
But of course it couldn't be that simple. Simón was craving for all the information and explanations I could give him. He deserves them after all...
I feel a hand on my shoulder, bringing my attention to the Mexican sitting in front of me. I remain quiet. Hoping that whatever his question is, it might be more direct and easy to answer to than me having to report again the events of that... unforgettable day.

"Wait there, Ámbar. I am sorry... You knew? You knew you weren't Sol Benson?"
I gulp and simply nod.
"Walk me through it. I didn't understand really what happened. How you found out..."

I sigh and chuckle with really no humor.
"I was really hoping you would let me skip this..." I confess and his face turns into guilt but I place a hand up, letting him know that now I will continue. "But it's unavoidable... Better tell the whole thing....
I am not sure how much Luna told you or what you know about my family before this whole Sol Benson thing started, but the lies and secrets on that family come from far earlier...

My biological mother is Sylvana. She gave me for adoption when I was 3 almost 4 years old. I don't know the reasons exactly, just that she was too young or something to raise me.
For some reason around that time Sharon decided she couldn't live alone, she needed a project, someone to raise at her image, so she adopted me. However, she didn't want to be known as my mother, so since I can remember she always told everyone that my parents were traveling and that she was my godmother, the super nice person who was raising me.
I wasn't stupid and after a while I knew it made no sense. Either I had to be so terrible that my parents wouldn't even bother to call and ear my voice, or this story was just that, a story.

Sharon not so happy ended up confessing it to me. So me, her and Rey were the only ones who knew, and we lived this lie... That was until she dropped the other lie that I was Sol Benson.
To be honest that day was one of the craziest but at the same time happiest days of my life.
I gained an identity, one which I thought reflected my past, a grandfather and Sharon was no longer my mother or godmother, she was my aunt. My parents were good and caring people so I had every reason to be like them and not the cold hearted girl Sharon wanted me to be. It wasn't as easy, specially because I had memories that didn't belong in the past I was suppose to have.

My biological mother found out about this lie, and although Sharon made her stay away from me, she tried everything she could to inform me that I was being lied to.
So when the second Roller Jam came, after you sang with Matteo, Pedro called me outside because there was a woman waiting for me.
And there I was, standing in front of my mother. The woman that gave birth to me.
Our conversation is a bit fuzzy to me, specially because I remember it with so much pain..."
With every word I get more and more emotional, the tears starting to build in my eyes. It's so hard and I want to play it tough, but my voice starts cracking so I have to stop.
I take a deep breath and feel Simón's hand on mine, encouraging me to continue and let it all out.

"I had seen her before. She went to my 17 birthday party. My godmother told me she was a gold digger and a liar. So when she told me I wasn't Sol Benson I didn't even consider believing it.
She screamed she was my mother, desperate to lead me to the truth. Again I didn't believe her. But she knew about the mark I have on my hip. This star, apparently I have since I was born..." I lift a bit of my shirt, letting him see it as well.