"Questioning" is nothing else than the fact of being uncertain about one's sexuality and/or gender identity.
Anyone can be questioning though most of the questioning people are teenagers going through puberty and young adults after they've had a few relationships and a lot of people consider questioning people as members of the LGBTQA+ community.
You are considered a "questioning" person if you:
- Often think about romantic/sexual relationships with the opposite sex and question your sexuality
- Question your identity as being a man/woman
- Experience dysphoria but don't know if you're transgender or non-binary
- Think about testing out new names/pronouns
- etc.
Being questioning is completely okay, you are not asked to know everything about yourself. It's alright to take all the time you need to discover who you are.
It's also completely okay to return to a phase of questioning. Never take anything for granted or stay narrow-minded. You never know what can happen in your life and gender and sexuality are not a choice nor a 100% stable trait.
However, once again I warn you, be careful considering yourself part of a group only to quit it and invalidating its members because of a bad experience and rather go from the most "opened" groups to the more "closed" ones (e.g. if you are questioning your sexuality, rather first say "I might be bisexual" rather than saying "I am gay" and realising you're not once you've had tour first gay relationship).
Also, genders and sexualities are not trends. It is not "cool" to be transgender, gay or any part of the LGBTQA+ community. Some of us are being persecuted for something we don't control and didn't choose.
These days, I've been seeing a lot of people transitioning for "fun", because it's "trendy" to be trans. But it's not! These people are called "transtrenders" and they have nothing to do with the LGBTQA+ community.
Somehow, some transtrenders manage to better transition than some actual transgenders and then they detransition because "it's no longer cool". This is very hurtful to the trans community!
It is okay to label yourself in a certain way when you're insecure, questioning and you find a label that describes your feelings. But think twice, educate yourself and if you misunderstood yourself and the signs, be kind to others.
Finally here are a few tips to help questioning people if you meet one:
- Don't ask every day if "they found out"
- Don't force or "suggest" a sexuality/gender because you feel like it corresponds to the person
- Encourage the person to get educated and talk to a concerned LGBTQA+ person
- If you are yourself part of the community, talk about your feelings and how you've found out to compare with the person's feelings and help them
- Regarding gender, help by trying out names/pronouns on the person so they can see which one they feel the most comfortable with
- Be patient! Be tolerant!
If you are questioning, feel free to drop questions here or on any other chapter and/or seek for help amongst our community!
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LGBT means diversity
AcakA quick educational guide for cishets, questioning and even members of the LGBTQA+ community. This place is also a place of love, support and Q&As. You might not agree with everything that I say, it's okay. Just leave a comment so we can debate and...
