The Business Place | k.nj + k.sj

⋆ 삼십칠⋆

this goes downhill within the second paragraph and talks about very sensitive and "triggering" things. missing this chapter won't really make you miss too much, but this is just a warning. I wanted to provide a bit of context to things that came up in the past chapters that resurface at this point in seokjin's life. it might be sudden, but that's how life works and it sucks

≪Seokjin's P.O.V.≫
≪Insecurities≫

Another patient few months of constant working went by in a blink and soon enough winter had passed and now spring was approaching quicker than we thought. I only had a month or two until I would be finished with my semester, therefore completing my master's degree and I think Namjoon is happier than I am at that fact.

Here I stood, staring at myself in the mirror of our bathroom while Namjoon talked on the phone downstairs. We dressed in dress pants and button-downs for a nice dinner by ourselves on the other side of town. All in honor of me getting through midterms, which I constantly told him it wasn't a big deal, but Namjoon thought otherwise.

With midterms just passing, which meant I got a break from work, only meant I had more work to complete back at the office that I haven't stepped a foot inside in almost three weeks. At one point I was near begging to leave the damn house because I had locked myself inside my office for hours on end every single day until two days ago - maybe that's why Namjoon's taking me out. 

Life has just felt insufferable the last week. Energy has been draining out of me slowly but I don't think I noticed until this morning when I barely made it out of bed and to the kitchen before seeing spots of black in my vision. 

Deja vu set in as I pressed my cold fingers against the burning skin of my forehead. I've never been so conflicted about the fact that Namjoon was far away. I didn't want him to witness whatever was happening to me right now, but I felt like I needed him near incase something did happen. 

"Happy one year anniversary, Seokjin."

My brain felt frazzled and I couldn't even figure out if I was seeing reality or if I was asleep and dreaming everything. I just saw myself in the third person and it was terrifying.

A bunch of roses were extended in Namjoon's arms while a warm smile took over his face. We were dressed similar to how we are now, my blazer fitting looser around me compared to when I looked up to myself in the mirror. Why do I not fit into it now? Did I gain weight? Did it shrink in the wash?

I gained weight didn't I?

My skin was ghastly now compared to the Seokjin I saw next to me in the mirror, who was beaming while getting ready with a bouquet next to him on the sink. Warmth surrounded me as my vision kept getting more and more blurry, even with my glasses on. 

What is happening?

I'm going insane, that's what's happening. No sane person sees themselves in the mirror next to them. Maybe midterms took too much of a toll on my body than I had anticipated. 

"-jinnie, Seokjin?"

I looked up from the mirror, Namjoon stood right behind me with a worried look casted over his face. "I've been stood here calling for you, are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

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