Between the Sun and the Stars

Paradise Found

Happy Birthday to you,

Happy birthday to you,

Happy birthday dear Sutton,

Happy birthday to you.

Our parents, the band, Stephanie and her fiancee, my sister and a few close friends from my yoga class came to our home to celebrate an early first birthday for Sutton, seeing as we were hitting the road next week for eight weeks. We did a cake smash photo shoot for the invitations, and today we had bbq and cup cakes to celebrate. It was wonderful to have our parents down for Father's day and her party. We took plenty of pictures and the party ran through her nap time. By six, our friends were leaving, and seven o'clock came around she was getting fussy.

Our parents were heading out to their hotels to catch their flights while Stephanie and her fiancee David stayed in the basement suite. Once Sutton was in bed, we all gathered in the backyard enjoying some drinks around the fire table. "One year down, the rest of her life to go," I laughed, sipping my wine, "I can't believe she's just two weeks away from being a year." She was crawling, eating soft solid foods like bananas and avocado, and started making noises that almost sound like words. 'Ama' and 'Aba' were her 'mom' and 'dad' words, otherwise everything else was gibberish. The rest of the evening was catching up after the Teen Choice Awards and gearing up to go on the road. "I feel so weird kind of switching roles right now," I said, reaching for Hunter's hand, "like we talked about this countless times but now that it's actually happening I almost feel like I'm being a little selfish. I know I'm not abandoning her, like its an hour of my night that she will be sleeping for." 

Stephanie smiled, "You love her, that's why it feels weird." 

Hunter chimed in, "You worked hard for this, and you deserve to enjoy it." 

Eventually, the guys left,  Stephanie and David retreated to the basement and Hunter checked on Sutton before we called it a night. It was nice to have everyone around to celebrate this past week. "Even though there is an extraordinary physical distance between us and our parents, it doesn't feel so great when they're here. Everyone gets along so well."

"Yeah, I mean I'm sure your parents weren't thrilled at first that I was stealing you on a tour bus," he smiled, "but I'm glad they got to know me. My parents love you and they probably love you more that you gave them such a lovely granddaughter." 

The next evening, we brought Stephanie and David to the airport, thinking the next time I'd see her would be a few days before their wedding. "I'm glad we got to meet David." Hunter nodded as we navigated home, "You okay Hunt?"

"Yah sorry," I looked at him, his jaw was a little tense, and he caught my stare, "What?"

"You're face is tense," I joked, gently poking his cheek, "what's on your mind."

"I don't know if I like David that much." He went on to explain how he seemed stand offish, didn't talk much, or if he did, it didn't seem genuine.

"Maybe he didn't know how to act.." I thought, understanding what Hunter said. 

"Act how? We are human too." 

I shrugged, "Well maybe he thought we would be stuck up and pretentious with our big house, record deals, awards and such. If Stephanie is happy - then that's all that matters."

"Fair enough." We pulled into the driveway, unpacked the baby and got cracking on packing for the tour next week. I was happy to be using Hunter's bus as it was already retrofitted with the crib for Sutton, and it felt more like home than any hotel room.

The first day of the Dan and Shay tour was upon us and we were in Dallas, Texas. The opening act was a Canadian singer named Shawn Austin. He performed acoustic, one-man sets and was pretty chill. My set times were usually 7:15-8:15 which meant I could still put Sutton to bed every night.

From Dallas, we went to Tulsa, Wichita, Denver, Sioux Falls, Cedar Rapids and Grand Rapids. We had three days off as we trekked out to Barrie, Ontario for the Boots Festival. I have not been here since the weekend Hunter brought me. That's the weekend I met Joelle. I was playing the Chevrolet side stage and shared that little bit of insight with the audience.

"Thank ya'll for your support between my music and all the positive things I see on social media. Before I go, I have one more song, but I wanted to tell you a little story, just for a minute," I could've heard a pin drop in the audience, "I was born and raised here in Ontario, and not too long ago, I met a very nice guy, I ended up marrying him. But before that, when we were dating, he invited me on tour with him. I came here to Boots and Hearts for the first time and I met Joelle. For those of you that may know, Joelle was dating someone in Hunter's band. We became instant friends and did almost everything together. She passed away just over a year ago and I struggled with accepting her death. Naturally, I looked for a way to heal that pain with music. This song is called I Will Remember You."

The music began and as I sang, I saw lighters and flashlights lighting up the evening sky. Tears filled my eyes as I looked over side stage to see Hunter holding Sutton with the biggest headphones over her ears. Tears filled my eyes as I made it through the rest of the song. The audience cheered and I could feel it through the floor of the stage. 

After Boots, we trekked on to PEI for Cavendish before heading down the eastern coast. We played in Albany, Philadelphia, Richmond, Greensboro, Savannah and Chattanooga for our final show. 

We stepped off of the bus in Nashville, hugged and thanks Dan, Shay and Shawn of an incredible tour. Even in our down time, Hunter jammed with everyone, and I'm sure a few songs were born on those eight weeks. We hauled our luggage into the front of the house, began unpacking in the living room as Sutton explored being at home. 'Hunter, look." I said, nodding toward Sutton as she hauled herself up on the edge of the sofa.

"You're getting so big, Sutton, stop growing." He laughed while taking a few pictures of her. 

"So, is there a second baby in our future?" I asked, sorting out the clothes that needed washing from my luggage.

"Already?" Hunter asked, half surprised.

I shook my head, "No, not right now, but in the future, maybe a few years. Gonna have to be careful when we play." I winked, tossing some socks in the hamper. Hunter nodded.

"One day, right now I'm just loving this paradise we've made for ourselves."