The Black Sheep

Close as Strangers

"Jesus-"

"Fucking-"

"Christ," I roll my eyes at the synched reaction from Zion, Bravon, and Chez when I get home.

"Doesn't she look nice?" My mom asks. I look completely different that I usually do. And in this moment, I never realized that I actually have boobs. She straightened my hair, I have piercings, I got my eyebrows and nails done, and my outfit is completely different than what I usually wear. A tank top with light blue ripped shorts and an oversized red flannel. I feel naked basically. And this is what I'm supposed to wear tomorrow to school since I promised my mom I would step out of my comfort zone. And I'm completely regretting it. "I'm so proud of you Zaya for letting me help you with your style," I give her a fake smile before she takes the rest of my bags upstairs. I sink to the floor and hide my face between my arm which sit propped up on my knees.

"Bro, your sister kinda looks hot," someone whispers.

"Dude, shut the fuck up. That's my sister," Zion says back. "The fuck are you doing on the floor?"

"Aside from my piercings and nails, I hate all of this." I stand up. "My legs are exposed and so is my chest and I feel naked and gross, but I promised her that I would step out of my comfort zone so I can't go back on my word, but this," I point to my outfit, "is not me. I like wearing my black jeans and hoodie. I feel safe and comfortable. She even bought me a dress. A dress! I hate all of this." I take off my flannel and walk over to the coat rack and throw a hoodie on. I sigh in relief. I feel slightly better.

"Damn, I never knew that's how you felt," Zion says.

"When do you ever? You know nothing about me. Tell me what's my favorite TV show." He stands there quietly. "What countries do I wanna visit?" Silence. "What's my dream college and job?" Complete silence. Even his friends stay quiet. "That's what I thought. But I bet you can tell me all that information about your friends. You don't know what goes on in my head or my outlook on life. Did you know that I'm a feminist and I support the LGBTQ community? Of course not because you don't give a damn about me. But I know those things about you. Your favorite show is Adventure Time. Your dream job is to be a professional Basketball player first and if that doesn't work out, your back up is Football. You don't wanna be a professional Baseball player. You just do it for fun. Your dream college is the University of Miami, but you wanna go to community college here first. You wanna travel to Brazil, Africa, especially Chad. And your favorite color is blood red. I know everything about you. How? Because that's what I do. I listen and remember these things. You should try it sometime." I push past them and I run upstairs to my room and push the bags of clothes off my bed. I put my hair into a bun as I just sit there with my legs crossed. I don't know what to do with my life anymore.