Sad Girl Clapback *Now Available in Amazon*

H e a l i n g ~ Your problem isn't that important

The number of times where a friend described her relationship situation and I instantly went: "Same! I went through the same thing! How come no one talks about it?" is actually ridiculous.

Are you ever just talking to a guy or you're in a relationship and something has been bugging you for a while.

The first time they did it, it bugged you a bit but you brushed it off.

Then they did it again and now it agitates you even more.

So, you do the thing everyone always talks about – communicating.

You tell him how you feel about this thing that's been frustrating you like crazy. You go on this long 30-minute confession of how whatever they do doesn't make you feel so great and brings up feelings of irritation, stress, frustration.

And when you're done – taking your friend's advice by telling him how it makes you feel, he says:

"Okay. I'm sorry. I won't do it again."

Then you move onto a different topic and the conversation changes as if everything was resulted within an instant three-lined response.

You feel great in the moment, have a grand conversation and eventually, you either hang up the phone or depart from him.

But for some reason, the issue still doesn't feel resolved.

Even though he did say he wouldn't do it again.

Maybe you were expecting too much of a huge apology or bigger discussion where you weren't the only one talking about how you feel.

Before you talked to him, this issue was bugging you for days, perhaps even weeks – stressing you out, keeping you up at night, blocking your focus from anything else but this one thing, and to understand it was all resolved within a quick three-sentenced apology is...surreal.

You start to question if your problem was even that big of a deal anyway.

And maybe you were just blowing it out of proportion after all this time.

But you spent so long thinking about it, giving it your attention, it even draining you – there was no way it was just a small insignificant wrinkle in your relationship.

I've learned the only true way of telling is giving yourself time.

We always expect an instant relief off our shoulders or a moment of clarity once we tell someone how we feel.

But sometimes that doesn't come right away. It may not hit you until a few hours later or the next few days.

If the off-feeling goes away within time and you're no longer agitated, that's when you know it wasn't that big of a deal.

But if in a few days you still feel a little off, or you find yourself getting agitated all over again, then clearly something wasn't resolved and it's time to talk about it again – because clearly the problem was something bigger than he made it out to be.