Insecure (Completed)

28

Devonte

I ain't wanna rain on Yaz's parade about Thanksgiving break. I could tell she was excited, and I wasn't tryna put a damper on that. Me? Nah I wasn't looking forward to it. Only people with happy families liked Thanksgiving anyway.

I lived my teenage years in a house about forty-five minutes from Unity's campus. About an hour from our apartment. After Yazmine left to go catch her plane, I decided to just go on home.

"When you going home Trey?" I went into Trey's room. Since midterms ended, he had come back home. Sometimes, I could catch a ride back with Trey when we went on break.

"Probably tomorrow morning. You tryna roll out tonight?" He looked up from his phone.

"Yeah, may as well." Originally, I was gonna go home on Thursday, but I was itching to be back home.

"Shit, aight. I can drop you off."

"Nah, not if you not going home tonight. I can Uber, shit."

"Nah it's cool. I can go home tonight."

It was only four days so I already had what I needed packed up. I left Trey to throw his shit in a bag and settled in a couch.

Ten minutes later he came out of his room with an Adidas bag slung over a shoulder.

"We out then," he called to me. I grabbed my own bag, and my phone. We both left out, and Trey locked up.

"I told Amari I'm out," he remarked, unlocking his car. I stuffed my bag in the backseat.

"Aight. I called Yazzy and she made it in. She's home."

"Yeah, I texted her." Trey cranked the car up, and I flipped on the radio. Kendrick Lamar's LOVE. started playing.

I rubbed my hands together as I waited for the car to heat up. It was still fall but winter liked to creep up on a nigga.

"You get them results yet?"

I shot Trey a look before remembering he was driving and couldn't see my expression. "Hell nah. I would have said sum if I did."

"True." He relaxed and drove and I tried to relax but it was hard. I turned around and reached in the backseat for my bag. Rummaging around, I found my weed.

"Really nigga? You know yo Aunt will kick yo ass if you come home smelling loud."

Trey was right. I was tripping. I put my stash back and exhaled.

The song changed to First Day Out. I turned the radio off.

"You good?"

"I'm straight," I told Trey. I say stiffly the rest of the car ride, and watched as we got closer to my home. The house I grew up in was in the worst part of the hood. Well that ain't true. Before my pops went to jail we had a nice house. It wasn't in the best part of town, because my pops never could quite leave the hood, but it was decent. Afterwards, we lived in the worst part of the hood until my mommas death.

I hadn't been there in four years. My Aunt and Uncle had a nicer house but it was still the hood, not an up and coming part of town, like where Trey and his folks lived. I felt my eyelids start to droop.

It was like as soon as I dozed off Trey was yelling at me. "Wake yo ass up, nigga."

I jerked awake. In the dark I could still make out the silhouette of my house.

"I'm up, I'm up." I grabbed my bag, and dapped Trey up. "Thanks bruh."

"It ain't nun."

He pulled off, speeding as always. I took in the house. It wasn't much, but it was home. All the lights were off, which was what I expected. My Aunt and Uncle had always been early to bed types.

I had a key, so I let myself in. It was a one story house. I walked straight through the house until I reached the room I used to share with Andre. But that was a long time ago. Andre had been living on his own for a while.

I ain't even change. Just collapsed in the bed and fell asleep.

"Devonte Taylor, I know yo ass ain't come in my house and not even tell me you here!"

I blinked awake, noticing two things. One, the sun was streaming in my room. Two, my Aunt was in the doorway to my room, arms crossed.

I rolled out of bed. "My bad Aunty, y'all was sleep."

"Mhmm. Get over here and greet me properly lil boy!" I gave a guilty smile and gave her a hug. It seemed like no matter how old I got, I would always be her lil boy.

I released her and she studied me. "How are you?"

I knew she was talking about the fact that my dad was getting out today. I looked away. "I'm straight."

She read the lie on my face, but just shook her head. "You always straight, even when you not. Gotdamn stubborn. Just like yo father." Turning, she shuffled down the hall in her slippers.

I went into the bathroom to shower and brush my teeth. When I got out, and started down the hall, I could smell the proof that my Aunt had started to cook. Traditionally, the turkey went in the oven first.

I padded into the kitchen. Spotting my aunt at the stove I gave her a kiss on the cheek, also sneaking a look in the pots. She swatted me away. "Boy, gone!"

I dodged her, laughing. "Play too much," she sputtered.

"I luh you too Aunty."

"Mhmm, whatever. You need to find out what time Andre and whatever fast ass girl he dating coming over."

"Aight."

I dialed Andre but it rang out to voicemail.
Killing time, I went out on the porch. Mr. Tate from across the street was out on his porch too.

"Devonte, boy, is that you?" He squinted at me.

"What's good Mr. Tate." I crossed the street and hopped his fence.

"How you liking Unity? College treating you good?"

I nodded, even though I wasn't even sure if I passed my Spanish midterm. Oh well. There was always finals.

I chilled with him for a few minutes until Andre called.

"What's good?"

"Aunty said where you at?"

"Nigga, I just woke up. I know the food ain't ready yet, what she want?"

"Prolly to know when pops getting here."

"I ain't getting him. I offered last time I saw him, but one of his girls is doing it."

"Aight. Still though, when you coming?

"Ion know. Maybe around four. When y'all actually start eating."

"Bet."

I hung up and went back into the kitchen. "Dre said he coming around four."

"And what about your father?"

I shrugged. "Dre ain't picking him up. One of his girlfriends is."

My aunt sighed, and dried her hands. "I know you have a difficult relationship with your father Devonte, but can we try to enjoy the fact that he's coming home today?"

"I'm straight."

And I was, all the way up until the moment my father walked in the door.