Insecure (Completed)

38

Devonte

"Devonte what the hell is this?"

I looked up from my 2k. Squinting, I saw she had a paper in her hand, but I ain't know what it was. From the look on her face, she did.

"I'm a try this again. Why the fuck you got paternity test results?"

I slammed down my controller. "You was going through my shit?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. You just gonna ignore my question and expect me to answer yours?" She had murder in her eyes. "Why you got these? Who you impregnate?"

"So you gonna act like the results don't say I'm not the father."

"Who you was fucking then?"

"It was before we was together."

She pursed her lips. "Yeah, I might have believed that, if you didn't hide this entire situation from me. If it was before we was together, why wouldn't you just tell me Yaz, I gotta tell you something, a girl I was fucking on before we was together saying she pregnant and it's mines." Tears began to form in her eyes and it hurt. I hated to see her cry. And I never thought I would be the reason.

I got up from the couch and went to her, but she held up a hand, blocking me.

"Don't fucking touch me!"

I froze. "Yazmine, I swear, I never cheated on you. That girl was on some drama type shit. She just wanted to start something. And I knew I fucked so I took the test but it ain't mine."

"I want to believe that, but that don't explain why you would hide it, I've never been unreasonable you could have told me. Which makes me not believe you." The tears were drying in her eyes to make room for something else: anger. Yaz was pissed.

"I ain't wanna tell you Yazmine. If it wasn't my baby I ain't wanna burden you with none of it."

"Well I'm burdened now. And this a different type of burden, the type that comes from discovering your boyfriend has been hiding shit. What else you hiding? Huh? Any other girls running around saying they carrying your baby?"

I found myself dragging my hand down my face. "Yaz, chill, please, and hear me out."

"Nah. You had your chance to talk. Which was when the girl came to you with this shit, and you ain't tell me and you never would have told me and I just...ugh! I can't do this." She threw the paper at me, and it fluttered to the floor. Turning on her heel, she marched to the front door.

"Where you going?" I hated how desperate my voice sounded.

"I don't owe you shit nigga." She slammed the door behind her so hard, the house shuddered.

I let her have some space. But then her ass ain't even come back, when it hit night time. I was tryna be cool, like aight, maybe she staying with a friend or some shit. She ain't even post nothing on social media so I couldn't even stalk her.

I was low key freaking out a lil by the time Trey woke up. By this point it's like almost midnight. He came limping out his room on his crutches, rubbing his eyes.

"Yo, I fucked the fuck up."

He shook his head. "What you do?"

"Yaz found the test results."

He put his fist to his mouth. "Oh shit! Nigga how she find something that you burned and sprinkled the ashes off of a cliff?"

I blinked. "Nigga I forgot about that shit, it was in my drawer I think."

"In your drawer? You forgot?" His eyes got wide. "And the award for dumbest nigga alive goes to you, for making me believe that you could be smarter than that, shit." He headed for the kitchen. "I can't even help you fam, like your stupidity is at an all time high. Where Yaz at?"

"Man I don't know! She been gone for six hours and she not hitting me back. Matter of fact, text her, see if she responds."

"I gotchu." He messed around in the kitchen then joined me in the couch with a plate of food. I had been sitting in the couch, but ever since Yaz left, my mood switched and I ain't wanna play the game no more.

Trey picked up a controller. "She text you?"

"Not yet."

There was some silence. "She really think a nigga cheated, man. She never gonna talk to me again. She was crying."

Trey paused the game. "You made my lil sis cry? Nigga what the fuck!" He punched me in my chest and that shit hurt. But not as much as the fact that Yazmine wasn't speaking to me did.

"Yo, chill!"

"Nigga! I am chill. Ought to stomp you out. How you gonna fuck up a relationship the same way twice? You drove Bre's ass away too, since you like hiding shit."

I gave him a glare. "Nah don't be bringing Bre in this. That shit was totally different. She the reason we broke up, not me. She pulled the foul shit, not me."

"You never let that girl in, Devonte. Like ion understand yo ass, you the type to be catching feelings and keep that fact all to yourself. A relationship is give and take nigga. And you still struggling to give."

He wasn't lying. But shit was hard for me. You don't go your whole life keeping shit bottled up, then all of a sudden start handing out your deepest darkest secrets because you like some girl.

This pregnancy shit though. Now, that wasn't hard. Or at least it shouldn't have been. But every time I even thought of shaping my mouth to tell Yaz, it was like there was a vise-like grip around my throat, choking me and not letting words escape.

That's why I still had the test. I was going to tell her, I was. When I could actually pull the words out of my mouth. But shit, that was the back end. I should have opened my mouth the day shawty pulled that shit in the book store. I know ain't shit held me back but fear.

And I hated fear. Made me feel weak. But now I was feeling stupid because I ain't cheat on this girl and the trust between us was so fucked up, she ain't believe me.

And that was my fault.

A/N: Oop 👀.