Worst in Me//SebaCiel AU

Ch. 12

I loosened my tie as I laid down on the roof looking up at the sky. The week was almost up and it would be spring break soon. Which brought with it my birthday. I sighed and put one hand behind my head while I hovered the other in front of my face.

My father's ring glinted in the sunlight. My eyes traced the soft curves in the silver band and raked across the sharp edges of the blue jewel. I frown and let my hand fall against my chest. I watched the clouds float by lazily and the birds fly through the air.

When we were at the orphanage I envied them. They stayed in the beautiful cerulean sky. They could soar through the air. They were free.

I suppose now I am free. I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply. Warm air filled my lungs. The scent of freshly cut grass and the flower garden wafted into my nose.

I stayed there on the roof for a while before I went back into the house. I joined the rest of the family in the private sitting room and took a seat in the recliner. I hung my tie and my vest over the back of my chair before opening my newest book.

It was easy to get lost in another world when yours wasn't perfect. I ignored the eyes on me for as long as I could before I looked up at the twins. Quirking a brow I closed the thick tome and gave them my full attention.

"You haven't scared him off yet," Lizzy whispered.

"We were just wondering if he was going to be-"

"No," I cut Alois off, "I already told you that I'm not going to fall, I'm glad you two are happy, I really am but I can't".

"You can't what, Sir?" Sebastian questioned as he and the other two servants walked into the room.

"It's none of your concern, jackhole," I reply shaking my head.

"Ciel-"

"Don't Ciel me, Lizzy. I just can't," I sighed standing up. I grabbed my vest and my tie and left the room. I love them dearly but they don't understand. I press my lips together. I couldn't keep a servant like they have.

I can't be like Alois who chose a servant that can put up with his shenanigans and not bat an eye. A servant that would do anything just because I asked even if they were bad at it. Hell I can barely spend time with my family much less a butler.

I can't be like Elizabeth who chose a sweet, ditzy little thing. I can't have someone who is always happy. I can't handle someone who is too spaced out to put their uniform on right half the time. Someone who was clumsy and forgetful.

No, I can't do that.

I opened the door to my room and my eyebrow twitched. My lovely blue bed set had been replaced. The horrid neon pink color made me want to vomit just looking at it. This means war.