TEENAGE → SVT

TRAUMA

TRACK 07: TRAUMA

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The girl who hurt Wonwoo was a girl in disguise. She looked like a nice person, acted like a nice person, and apparently loved Wonwoo more than anything else in the world. She was a lie. She lived a lie, she was a lie, and she told lies. She was the fakest person to ever have a hold on Wonwoo's life, and she did him so dirty. She ruined his life second by second, moment by moment. She built up his world, and then she ruined it with the snap of her fingers. Wonwoo hated her. He was traumatized by her.

Wonwoo never really had any friends through middle school. He knew a couple of people like Mingyu and Vernon, but he was never really friends with anyone because he liked being alone. He liked having his secrecy, his own little bubble and world to live in. Music was his only salvation, but at some point, it was starting to get a little lonely. Wonwoo was a little too alone. When he got to high school, Wonwoo was still pretty much alone. He basically had no friends, and he felt like that was going to be the rest of his high school life. He was going to enter high school alone, and he was going to graduate alone.

It changed though when a girl from one of his classes recognized him during lunch one day. She remembered that he would sit in the back of the classroom and sleep half the time. She joked about it with him the day she noticed him. She introduced herself to him as Kimhee. She invited Wonwoo to sit with her and her friends during lunch. He was hesitant at first, but Wonwoo took her hand and joined her.

Kimhee exposed her entire world to Wonwoo. She introduced him to happiness, sadness, anger, love, hate- and she pulled him out of his shell. Wonwoo didn't realize that he wanted to live a life of different emotions until he met her. She really did mean the world to him because she gave him her world. Kimhee gave Wonwoo her world on a silver platter, and Wonwoo accepted the new world graciously.

Wonwoo really did owe everything to Kimhee. She was a shoulder to cry on, she was a loving embrace, she was the girl that made Wonwoo feel human. In fact, Kimhee gave him so much that Wonwoo couldn't help but give her one thing: his heart. Wonwoo opened up to Kimhee. He told her about his past, about his loneliness, and he thought to himself that if Kimhee didn't run away upon hearing his tragedies and traumas that she was a keeper. Kimhee didn't run away. She stayed, and she made Wonwoo like her even more.

That was when Wonwoo asked Kimhee to be his girlfriend. He was afraid to ask her at first because the idea of rejection terrified him, but when it came to asking Kimhee for anything, he felt comfortable and less scared. Wonwoo asked Kimhee to be his girlfriend, and Kimhee said she would be his girlfriend. All of their friends were enthusiastic about their newly defined relationship mainly because since they spent so much time with each other even before they started dating, they thought the two looked really good together. That was when Wonwoo started dating Kimhee, and that was when everything changed.

Kimhee was a really good friend- the bestest friend Wonwoo could ever ask for. He was excited to be dating his best friend, but the truth was that Kimhee was the worst girlfriend. She manipulated him into doing anything and everything that she wanted him to do at the cost of his mental sanity. She talked shit about all of the friends that she introduced Wonwoo to, she wouldn't let him touch her in public even though up until that point she was really touchy with him, and she told him to leave her alone, which was the biggest red flag to Wonwoo because they were the bestest friends, so why did they need space?

Later, when Wonwoo tried to break up with Kimhee, even though he loved her from her past self, Kimhee started crying. She would not let him break up with her. Wonwoo found himself trapped in the most toxic relationship he could ever be in, and she was his first girlfriend too. Wonwoo tried to leave her. He would stay as far away from her as he could, and his friends started to believe that they broke up. Wonwoo wished it was true, but it wasn't. When they found out from Kimhee that their relationship was having problems and that it was "Wonwoo's fault," they all stopped talking to him. Wonwoo found himself all alone again even though he thought his whole world changed.

Within the three years that Wonwoo knew Kimhee, she pulled him out of his shell and exposed him to the world, only to rip the world out of his hands and confiscate it almost as if he was a small child who had misbehaved. Wonwoo wanted to die at that moment. He didn't want to live with his trust broken in such a cruel way. He couldn't even bring himself to hate Kimhee after all she did. He still loved her even though she hurt him.

Kimhee turned into Wonwoo's trauma. It became difficult for Wonwoo to trust anyone after what she did to him. Wonwoo felt all alone. What was once a comfortable feeling was now horrid to him and made him want to curl up in a hole and literally just die. There was no one to save him. Kimhee would've saved him, but Kimhee was the reason why he was in this mess. Kimhee couldn't save him, nor could she come back to Wonwoo. Wonwoo was all alone yet again, but he was traumatized this time.