TEENAGE → SVT

PINWHEEL

TRACK 08: PINWHEEL

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It's not like Jisoo travelled on that road a lot. He only really travelled there a grand total of two times: once going to a friend's house and the other coming back from his house. He wasn't alone when he was going to the house, either. He was with Jeonghan, Seokmin, Seungkwan, and Jihoon the time he travelled on that road, but for some reason, he was the only one who came back to look at the road.

The road was nothing special. It was a one-lane road that was divided by a dashed line. On one side of the road was a forest, and on the other side was an ocean. Jisoo liked to sit along the side of the road and stare at the ocean. The waves would come crashing into the shore all the way at the end of the cliff that the road sat atop. Jisoo liked to hear the sounds of the waves crashing in. It made him feel a little more peaceful.

The road isn't used often. Although the road looks brand new, the road has been there for quite some time. The paint on the road is slightly worn, but the lines are still there. Jisoo liked to look at the lines and walk along them. It was a way for him to kill all the time he had. Jisoo had a lot of time on his hands.

Jisoo used to wonder why his friends didn't like coming to see the road with him. They came with him one time after they drove to their friend's house and back, but that was the only time they came to see the road. They didn't like anything about the road, much to Jisoo's despair. He really wanted his friends to appreciate the beauty that the scenery around the road possessed, but they couldn't see this beauty that Jisoo saw. Jisoo was the only one.

Jisoo liked to cry at the road a lot. He didn't know why he was crying, but sometimes, emotions would just grab his lungs and suffocate them until he got them all out. Jisoo was never one to scream at the top of his lungs, but he was one to cry his heart out until his eyes were red and swollen from crying too much, and his lungs were exhausted from trying to supply him with oxygen. He never cried in front of his friends, though. His friends, when they came to the road with him, cried, but Jisoo didn't cry. He just smiled softly the entire time.

Sometimes, people decide to drive on the road, and it's not that Jisoo got excited or anything- it was almost as if he was expecting people to join him on the road. Sometimes, when people decide to drive on the road, Jisoo will either sit in the middle of the road or stand to face the car motionlessly. He'll expectantly wait for the car, and when the car starts heading towards him, Jisoo embraces the car, full impact and all. However, he doesn't feel anything from the impact. The car passes right through him, and Jisoo sighs to himself. He tries to die over and over again, but no matter what he does, nothing will kill him because he is already dead.

The day he and his friends were returning from their friend's house was the day Jisoo died. They got into a car accident on the road that barely any people drive on. It was unfair for Jisoo, though. Even though all his friends were wearing their seatbelts, and even though Jihoon was driving safely and following all the rules, Jisoo still managed to fly out of the car upon impact, and he died on the road.

Seungkwan, Seokmin, Jeonghan, and Jihoon only visited the spot Jisoo died once, and the buried a flower by the tree where he died. They spoke a couple of words about how they regretted the entire incident, how much they missed him, and how much they loved him, and then, they left. They never came back. They didn't come back to put a new flower in the place by the tree after the first flower they placed there died. The flower died, but Jisoo did not.

It's not that Jisoo ever got a choice to leave the road. Jisoo was tied to the road because he died there. His spirit would remain on the road forever and ever until one day his spirit vanished. When Jisoo sees another car driving on the road, he doesn't get excited- he was expecting people to join him on the road. Jisoo was lonely. He didn't want to be dead on the road alone. He was waiting for another person to accompany him on the road that Jisoo should have never died on.

One day, Jihoon came back to the tree. It was five years after the incident. There was no wind even though they were by the ocean, and there were no crashing waves that day. The day was peaceful. Jisoo tried calling out to Jihoon when he came, but Jihoon couldn't hear him. He went to the tree, the spot that Jisoo died, and he muttered a couple of sentences, most of them containing the word "sorry."

Jihoon didn't spend much time there. He was there, and then he was leaving. Jisoo wanted him to stay. Jisoo wanted Jihoon to keep him company, but Jihoon didn't do that. Instead, he placed a pinwheel right at the tree where the flower once was, and he left. Just like that, Jihoon left. Jisoo ran to the tree, a gust of wind suddenly following him.

As the wind blew, Jihoon turned around to look at the pinwheel one last time. The pinwheel turned slowly in the wind, and Jihoon smiled as a single tear rolled down his cheek. He seemingly looked directly at Jisoo, who was standing in front of the pinwheel, and said, "Jisoo, we'll come back one day."