Stay With Me (Niall Horan Fan Fiction)

Chapter 28: Saying Goodbye Looks Easier in Movies

*Violet’s POV*

            I was never one to attend funerals. I remember one time, when I was about eight years old, one of my grandmother’s friends had passed away. And she brought me along to the wake. The entire time I was oblivious of what was going on around me. Not grasping the fact that people were there for mourning. My young childish mind thought we were at a party, and I remember loudly asking my grandmother, “Why does she get to sleep?”

            If only I still had the innocence of a child that I had then, because now this was too real for my liking. I would give anything, anything in the world than to be here right now. Burying my best friend.

            She was gone, and there was nothing I could do about it. Nothing…

            After hanging up the phone with Niall that day at the hospital, and made my way back to the waiting room where everyone else was, I spotted one of the doctors finally talking to Liz. I rushed over, anxious to find out what had happened to Sage. But as I got closer, the solemn look on the doctor’s face made me stop in my tracks.

            As he finished talking, suddenly everything went into slow motion. I saw Liz’s hands go up to cover her mouth as fresh tears filled her eyes. Loud sobs began to escape her mouth and she looked like she was about to collapse to her knees. The young doctor gathered the unstable woman in his arms and led her over to a chair to make her take a seat.

            The noises around me started to flush out, sounding like what music sounded when your headphones got pulled out half way; muffled and vaguely audible. I could feel the tightness in my chest intensifying and my breathing started coming out in short, gasp-like breaths. There was this loud screaming going on around me. It kept getting louder. Blocking out what remained of the muffled noise around me.

            It wasn’t until afterwards that someone told me the screaming was me. That I had lost all control and nurses ended up having to tranquilize me with soft sedatives to calm me down.

            Her time of death was approximately 2:30 in the morning, on a Sunday. It had been a foggy day, and now I understood why. Weather always seemed to fit the theme of how the day would go. At least it usually did for me.

            The boys didn’t arrive until a day later, and when they did things just weren’t the same. Harry remained locked in his room, refusing to emerge from the dark. Garrett vanished once more, and I, well I wasn’t doing any better.

            I remember Niall climbing into bed with me and holding me the entire night as I cried in his arms. I cried harder than I ever had before, and he never let go. Not even once.

            Now I stood in a cemetery, watching the black coffin slowly get lowered six feet under. Not much emotion was left in me. I felt so drained, so tired, just done. I stared listlessly at the muddy pit, not wanting to believe that she was really gone.

            I honestly kept expecting her to walk up behind me with a confused smile on her face. Saying, “Why is everyone in such a dark mood? I’m right here you bunch of idiots!”

            But she didn’t, and she couldn’t. She would never be able to announce her presence. Or make any snarky comments about the boys or myself. I would never get to here her voice drip with sarcasm, or see her roll her eyes in frustration whenever someone didn’t get what she was saying.

            I would never be able to hug her, or see her happily wrapped in Harry’s arms on a lazy Saturday afternoon. Lounging on the couch just watching movies all night. It all just came to an abrupt halt.