Me and my dads (a phanfiction)

5. Dying dreams.

A/N HI! So I am writing this (well at least the starting of it) at 1 am in the night. And I thought that was necessary to let you know. Well, time for me to make sense. ENJOY.

It was a beautiful life my parents gave me. "Everyone's got their demons." Dan used to say to me. I never disagreed. I got a sister, her name was Eveline Alice Lester Howell (A/N Eveline is a Dutch name fyi, pronounced as Ay-ve-lee-nè) I and every dutch person called her Eveline or "Eef" (Afe) for short. My family and every other English/foreigner person would call her Alice. My name Anna allways worked out for me in every language. Well I love my sister. We were in different friendgroups at school and outside, but of we walked across each other, we'd allways at least say a quick Hi.

At home we loved fooling our parents, and they allways fooled us back. For example: when Dan or Phil was filming and the door behind them was open, and in the camera's view, we would allways walk past that door and do some silly dancing. Most of the time they didn't know what was going on behind their backs. But of they found out, they didn't say anything, but switch me and my sister of rooms while we were asleep. So we would wake up in the other room by our parents, calling me Alice, and calling Alice Anna, or some other wierd joke like that.

My nightmares almost completely faded away, but the voices got worse. I discovered that if someone was talking to me, the voices finally shut their mouths. So at night I listened to the full version of Canto Ostinato on the lowest volume.

I loved it how Alice, Dan, Phil or Melanie got on crazy (positively crazy) ideas to make the voices go away. Alice allways offered to scream at me, when she noticed the voices were coming back. Dan allways made Delia Smith pancakes.

And me and Alice went to VidCon, Summer In The City or The Dutch YouTube Gathering when it was in the vacation (accept for tdytg, that wasn't far away and allways in the weekend , and in Holland). When a gathering wasn't in any holiday, my grandparents (so sometimes Dan's and sometimes Phil's parents) would visit Holland and care for us. Well Dan's parents were already in Holland, since they moved there after my parents moved here. My grandpa is Dutch, so he, me and Alice were the only one in the family who could properly speak Dutch. Dan's mother and my parents had (in the opinions of the Dutch) hilarious accents. Phils parents were really kind, and allways made jokes.

The internet would call me and Alice the Phan babies, or the Phan sisters. They called me, my sister, and my parents the internetphamily or Phanice Howster (cuz' internet). We would be the 'royal internet family', since my parents were the first ship who got married and got children. Dan and Phil would be the kings, and we'd be the little princesses. Sometimes in school they called me Phanna Howster. I have allways preferred just Anna.

Now I am 14 years old, Alice is 9 and I have uploaded my first YouTube video. I actually told my parents afterwards, so I could begin from the bottom and not get just comments saying "Phanna Howster this and Phanna Howster that", which I knew I was going to dislike.

I kinda wanted to create my own ambiance in my public. I wanted to start from the bottom, because numbers didn't make sense to me anymore. My parents had millions of views, likes, subscribers, comments, followers on twitter, Instagram, etcetera. I wanted to get the meaning of the numbers back. I wanted to be proud to have ten subscribers. I didn't need a lot of subscribers anyways. I just wanted enough to get some useful feedbacks from viewers.

Well that kinda went wrong after I told my parents. They tweeted about my introduction video for my Dutch and English channel and how proud they were. Well, the next day I had 10.000 subscribers, and tons of views and comments and a lot of fuss around it.

But almost no one said something like "Phanna lol" or "omg, phanbaby!!!1!!" Or anything like that. People actually have good feedbacks, or revered to my parents in a more positive way, like "wow you're just as photogenic as Phil" or "Do you have editing-genes?". I also got really good tips, and poeple just complimenting