third person pov
grace had turned on a movie, leatherface to keep the pair occupied. grace was only mildly unsettled by the gorey scenes although gus didn't even flinch at all the blood and violence. after a long silence grace spoke up "if we're sharing, my mom overdosed when i was 14, i found her body when i got home from school" grace told gus, a hint of sadness in her voice "im sorry, that must have been hard. ive lost a lot of buddies to drugs" gus spoke, unsure of how to react to the sudden information about grace "why do them then?" grace asked gus about his habits "only thing that helps with the pain, my minds a bad, bad place" gus spoke, grace frowned at his words "if you ever need anything you know where to find me" grace offered gus "thank you, you've been too kind" gus thanked grace for her actions today. grace and gus settled back into the couch focusing back on the movie. grace jumped a little at the movie, gus took the opportunity to put his arm around grace's shoulders. gus usually didn't usually get romantically involved with girls but grace seemed to open up to him, and was comfortable with him which was unusual for him. grace looked at him a little unsure but quickly relaxed into him. he had a lingering scent of cigarettes. grace said he had kind eyes but she also noticed a deep sadness to his eyes, she wondered what he'd seen, what he'd been through. grace cuddled into his side a little closer. that made gus happy, but gus knew himself; he would say or do one wrong thing and fuck it all up. gus began to fall asleep watching the movie, his brown eyes fluttering closed. grace didn't notice until gus' sleeping body limply leaned the arm of the couch away from grace. grace carefully slid out from under his tattooed arm, careful not to wake him. she gently placed his legs on the couch so he could sleep more comfortably "goodnight gus" she whispered before going into her own room to get ready for bed. grace was intrigued by gus she was saddened that he would only be able to stay one more night. it wasn't that she didn't want him stay, it was that shiloh was coming back home from her weekend trip to go visit her sister, and shiloh was a lot less accepting and easy going than grace was. although she was her best friend she wouldn't like gus. there would be no way she would allow grace to have gus stay while she was there, the drugs, his look, his story would all deter shiloh from giving him a chance. grace wished she could move out on her own but she couldn't afford it. she was only 19 and worked part time at a local coffee shop to help cover the rent her and shiloh split each month, with little left over to pay for food and other small needs. after grace's mother died it left her with her deadbeat father who didn't do much for her, he worked long hours and didn't seem to care much about grace after the loss of his wife. when she turned 18 she moved out and found shiloh, who had been really the only person in her life for the last year and a half. shiloh was a year older than grace, and a lot more stable. grace loved her but also was slightly envious of her, she was gorgeous, was attending college where she planned on becoming an aesthetician, her family was stable and she had other people in her life outside of grace. as much as grace loved shiloh, if she could afford it she would move out in a heartbeat. grace's mind wandered back to gus, she found him quite attractive to be honest. he had a beautiful smile, with all of his tattoos he was a walking piece of art in her eyes. in the other room gus was fast asleep, dreaming vividly or more so flashing back vividly "gus please" the man under him begged, "shut up" gus muttered. gus sat atop of ned, an old friend and client of his. he owed gus a lot of money, to add to that he had slept with who at the time was gus' only girlfriend, layla. he hasn't dated since her. a rage had built up in gus over ned. he finally had enough which struck a full physical fight between the two. the two boys, only 17 at the time rolled on the ground, kicking and throwing punches. gus was 21 now but what was about to happen still haunted him. gus had managed to get on top of ned, he held his throat to keep him still has he threw multiple punches at his face. ned was bleeding everywhere, he coughed up blood right before gus delivered the fatal blow to his head. gus hadn't realized what he just did until ned's body went limp beneath him, the struggling noises stopped and gus looked down at the dead body beneath him "no no no" gus said in disbelief of what he just did. he panicked and ran back to his apartment where he washed the blood off of him. the image of his dead friend, his murdered friend would go on to haunt him for the rest of his life. gus woke up in a cold sweat. his eyes darted around the unfamiliar room, he remembered that he was at grace's and took a moment to collect himself. everyday his guilt grew heavier, the worse he felt, the higher he got. gus didn't want to deal with his feelings right now, he forced himself back to sleep, he didn't want to wake grace. the two were both on each other's minds, gus knew he couldn't stay but hoped he would see grace again after he left. he hadn't felt a desire to be with another woman since layla, he had felt emotionally numb and disconnected for years now, the useless, meaningless sex didn't please him anymore, his friends dropping out of his life constantly. he spent his days high and alone on the streets trying to forget.
