Bitchy lines (random quotes)

Twelfth Slap

Authors Note: Hi, readers (kung meron man). Baka gusto nyong basahin yung bagong gawa ko na story. Nasa works ko sya, title nya is "Catchy". Light lang yung story. Stress reliever lang after work. Hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

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Before you tell me what I did wrong, you should first know that I don't care.

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I only tolerate your bitchy comments because I imagine it must be hard to be such an unfortunate looking wench.

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Nothing brightens up a room like your absence.

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Just because I appear to believe your bullshit doesn't mean I'm as stupid as you think I'am. I'm just laughing inside and waiting to see what else you come up with.

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Be careful when opening your heart to a man. He'll probably try and stick his "D" in there too.

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I'am who I'am. Your approval is not needed.

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Sometimes I look across the office of my coworker and think: "It must be wonderful coming to work and being completely useless."

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Whenever I lock up my car, I always press the button twice in a row to let all nearby thieves know I mean business.

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Yes, we are aware of how obnoxious we are when we are together. No, we don't care.

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Don't look strength in his muscles. Look for strength in his life principles.

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Do you have any hobbies or talents besides being a homewrecker?

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I wish "You dumbass" was an appropriate way to end a work email.

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Getting real tired of wearing coat and tie and having responsibilities.

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Cheers to you and your (whore)ible replacement for me.

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Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so. There's a support group for that. It is called, "EVERYBODY", and they meet at the bar.

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Some days, the supply of available curse words is insufficient to meet my demands.

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Sorry for the mean, awful accurate things I said.

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Never go to bed angry. Stay awake and plot revenge!

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You can try, baby. But you'll never do it like me.