Ex-Girl, My Superwoman

Differences

Stephen

Nona and I have kinda been arguing more. She's distant and crying all the time and eating ice cream. We haven't even had sex in like a month. That's not a problem but I'm thinking maybe that's the problem.

"Uncle?" Lolo said coming into the room.

"Why you so dressed up? Where are you going?"

"Auntie is going to the doctors. She told me to tell you that and ask you to take me and Riley out."

Nona

I left going to my doctors appointment.

"Hi, Nona." Dr. Mendez said

"Hi." I returned giving her a smile back.

"So are you ready for this ultrasound?"

I nodded, feeling myself get emotional.

"Alright. It's okay to cry, Nona but don't stress yourself out."

"But that's all I've been doing, I'm so scared."

"Where is the baby's father?" She asked.

"At home... I haven't exactly told him. But only because I want to surprise him. But I'm scared of having another miscarriage."

"That's understandable but the reason you had the first miscarriage was from high blood pressure. Your bp is fine now. So stop worrying and relax. Just spend time loving him. I'm sure you've been giving him hormonal hell." She said, making me feel at ease as she rubbed the cold gel on my stomach.

"Okay so this is your baby, it's going to be very very small."

"Really?" I asked.

"Yea, but my dad said you were super tiny so it's normal for you." She said, referring to my mom's OBGYN who was my doctors dad.

"Okay. How far long am I now?" Since it's been a few months since over found out I was pregnant.

"Well... this is really gonna shock you.... Nona, honey... you're 6 months pregnant."

"Six fuckin- oh my God- what the fuck man, how could I not know?!"

"Well, that's just how it is sometimes. You'll start showing soon though. Do you want to set up an appointment to find out the gender?"

I nodded as she rubbed the gel off. This only means that I have to tell everyone sooner. And I had no idea. That means when I found out, I was 3 months pregnant. I'd already passed my first trimester. But... I'm happy because the chances of me having a miscarriage has slimmed a lot. Now to only pray my baby comes out super healthy.

Once I got home, no one was there... good. For some reason... I don't want to be around ANYONE. It's like my baby just wants privacy... from everyone. But I have a family and Stephen never goes home. I don't want him to leave me though. I've been such an asshole. But I'm just going to enjoy my loneliness, something tells me, I won't be able to enjoy this later.

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I woke up in my bed. It was clearly night time. But Stephen wasn't next to me. I got up starting to worry a little and heck to see if the girls were in their room. I sighed with relief when I saw Lolo. But I got worried when I didn't see Riley. Did he leave me? I thought to myself. I ran downstairs seeing, he was no where to be found. I looked outside the window to see his car was also gone. I went back upstairs to check my phone for his location. He was at his house. When tf did we say for him to leave? I thought referring to me and my baby.

I got back up, grabbing my duffle bag, packing most of my underwear and dresses, since they were all I really wanted to wear at the moment. I pack a few different sandals and shoes. I went into Lolo's room, grabbing her backpack and packing her clothes, toothbrush and all her other necessities. I grabbed my keys by the door and took our bags to the car. I went back upstairs, waking up Lolo and telling her to grab her stuffed animal. I grabbed my purse and things and we got in the car.

Just cuz I wanna be alone don't mean I wanna sleep alone, the fuck he thought.

I was going off on him in my head but I knew it was really this baby who was upset. Regular Nona would understand. But it's like these thoughts aren't just mine anymore.

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Stephen

I woke up around 11. I checked my phone seeing I had no messages except for from the coach, telling me to come to practice tomorrow.

I guess Nona really doesn't want us around.

"Baby, what's wrong?" I heard a voice, making me jump out of bed.

"Nona!! What the fuck?!?!"

"Watch your mouth! The kids might still be sleep." She said, clearly disappointed in my choice of language.

"Sorry... when did you get here?"

"Last night when I realized my house was half empty. You could nicely put me in bed and not-so-nicely leave me by my lonely."

"Well I assumed you didn't want us around anymore. I mean... you've been acting so weird."

"And it's all gonna pay off in due time, love. Just give me time... if I wanted space, I would tell you that. You taking the girls out was enough space for me. After that, you supposed to stay yo ass with me. I was worried and I can't afford to be stressed out. I just need you to... accept my moods right now okay?"

"What's wrong though?!" I asked getting frustrated.

"I'm stressed out Stephen... because I wanna do something nice for you but I'm sick."

"I don't need you to do anything but love me and my daughter and support me."

"And I do... I love you guys to death. I would never go through all this bullshit with you voluntarily if I didn't love you!"

"And what the hell are you going through?!"

"Paps are ALWAYS following me... they're always antagonizing me. I broke up a marriage. I'm a home wrecker. I'm a whore, slut, bitch. No one likes me. Everyone curses me. No one loves me but you and that sucks because I need all the love I can get right now and with you going back to training, I can't get that love. You have a job to do and so do I. I'm scared of losing you to all of these things."

She abruptly stopped talking and walked out the room. I watched her walk downstairs into the kitchen and start cooking breakfast.

I never thought of everything she was going through. Nona is so good at masking her problems and insecurities that I forget she has them and goes through them. She always so put together and seeing her break down reminded me that I could lose her much faster than she would lose me.