The studio was cold and empty. Just how I liked it. My creative juices flowed best when it was like this and it's very calming to me.
All I could think about was that woman. Music always put me in a trance and I needed that right now. I needed to be put in a different reality. I needed to not be able to feel anything. I needed to pour out how I felt at this very moment.
I played a simple melody composed of only two notes on the mini keyboard that was connected to the soundboard. I pressed record and soon the repeating sound of that one melody played throughout the studio.
My poetic juices started to flow inside of me.
I pressed record for the microphone. I got up and entered the sound booth. I stepped to the microphone and began to sing.
"I can hear your laugh, It's ringing through the hallways. I can see your smile, It's what gets me through my hard days. And your words was suppose to get me through my heartache, before my heartbreak," I sang. All of my words poured out of me naturally.
I stepped away from the microphone and went back to the keyboard. I stopped recording on the keyboard and on the microphone. I closed my eyes and placed my fingers back on the keyboard. I started playing around with the chords until I found a full melody that I liked. I hit record once again on the keyboard and on the microphone. Soon the sounds of the melody boomed through the speakers of the studio.
I walked back into the sound booth and walked up into the microphone. I put the headphones on, closed my eyes, and began to sing.
"There's an emptiness that only few ever feel. And I somehow missed the meaning of love that is real. And it compliments my scars that will never heal...Maybe I didn't deserve you. Maybe I just couldn't cure you. They told me that I didn't hurt you. Why do I feel like I turned you? Maybe I don't understand it. Tell me is this how you planned it? Did you see us so stranded? Maybe I'm too much to manage."
"And if you weren't gonna guide me, why bring me into the light? Must have done something to make you want to run and hide. Why oh why didn't you just live your life? And every girl needs a mother, and damn it I needed you. Instead you duck for cover. And you ran from the truth. And like kids do. You waited around for proof... Maybe I didn't deserve you. Maybe I just couldn't cure you. They told me that I didn't hurt you. Why do I feel like I turned you? Maybe I don't understand it. Tell me is this how you planned it? Did you see us so stranded? Maybe I'm too much to manage... Maybe I didn't deserve you..." I continued to sing as I broke down crying near the end of the song.
I opened my eyes, took my headphones off and walked out of the sound booth. I stopped recording and merged both of my recordings before saving the end product into the file name: Songs for Imani's album.
I sighed. I felt so much better after that. I took the notepad that was just lying next to the soundboard and the pen that was right next to it and started reviewing songs that I had already started until I heard a knock at the door.
I turned to the door to see Jaden entering the room.
"Hey," I said.
"You doing good?" He asked as he sat next to me. He placed his hand on my shoulder and looked me in the eyes for a reply.
"Yeah," I replied. "How do you know where I was?"
"Blue told me you went out to find peace. So I came here," He said.
I smiled. "You know so well," I said before pecking his lips.
"She also told me that a woman came over, claiming to be your biological mom and you freaked out. Do you wanna talk about it?" He asked.
I shook my head.
"You sure?" He asked and I nodded my head. "Alright then, Talk to me when you're ready, Okay," He said before releasing his hand from my shoulder, getting up, and leaving the room.
