Forever is Perfect

Chapter 45

NICKI POV

I laid in bed after putting the twins to sleep. Aubrey entered minutes later.

"How'd it go?" he asked, "With Londyn.."

"Surprisingly well." I took a deep breath. "I never imagined having that talk with her... especially so soon."

"She was ready." he stated.

"You guys came home early... did something happen?" I questioned.

"Uh yeah. Your ex hit on her." he took off his shirt.

"My ex?" I cocked my head to the side.

"The one I fought last time." he reminded me.

"JaMarcus hit on Londyn?!" I sat up. "Did you do anything?"

"What was I supposed to do? Fight him again? You got pissed last time." he removed his pants.

I exhaled, "I know.. I know. He's just so- ughhh!!"

"I know babe." he turned on the lamp by the bed before going to turn the rest of the lights off.

"I told her everything." I blurted out.

"What do you mean?"

"Everything about me, about us. I think the only thing she doesn't know.. is about how AJ was conceived." I admitted.

"Oh."

"She knows I tried to kill myself for years.. and about my ptsd and how when I fell in love with you, all of those things weren't as daunting for a little while." I shared, "She's worried about me."

"I love you." He put his arm on my flat stomach.

"I love you too." I replied.

"I know.. I know, you wouldn't have stuck it out this long if you didn't." he stated.

" Is it really sticking it out?" I asked.

"Are you honestly 100% happy with our relationship?" he turned to face me.

"I'm not 100% happy about anything Aubrey."

"No seriously.. You said Londyn is worried about you, but what about you? Are you worried about yourself?" he stared at me.

"What is there to worry about?" I blinked.

"Onika, are you afraid of me?"

"I'm not afraid of you." I said sternly.

"Nic.."

"You know thats true, if it gets too much you know I can stop you." I reminded him, "As long as the kids are safe, I don't care what you or anyone else does to me."

"Well it bothers me."

"Then stop doing it." I suggested.

"Its not that easy Nic."

"Why isn't it? What is it about me, that makes you so angry? Because its obviously just me.. You didn't do this before me, and it wasn't until I was pregnant with Londyn. What is it that I did to you, that made you this way?" I pleaded.

"Nic, I-"

"Because my exes yell at me and threaten me because I killed their kids and they know it, they just don't know how to prove it. And we fought when we were together because we weren't in love with eachother. But with you, its different.." I vented.

"I don't know Nic, honestly." his eyes teared up.

"And sometimes, I feel like the stupidest girl in the world. I have everyone in my life telling me to leave you, and yet I stay... And I cover my bruises and ice them until they heal over and over.." I sighed, "But I love you, and I can't stop loving you."