Our Minds

Chapter Eleven

Jake starts his story by explaining the whole nurse situation, but Miyo stops him, “Where’s Lillie?”

“Oh no, I’m such an idiot,” Jake groans at himself. He starts running down the hallway, the others follow closely behind. “Lillie!?” He shouts, but no answer. This reminds Clive of when Ethan was alone in that room and had a panic attack. “What’s Lillie’s disorder again?” Clive questions aloud. “She doesn’t have one, none of us do,” Jake snaps. “Then why can we all see a ghost?” Gwin argues. “Yeah, and why’d we watch it enter you?” Miyo adds. Jake balls his hands into fists. He can’t punch a girl. He merely sighs and shouts for Lillie again. No answer.

Jake pushes through one of the doors. Lillie sits on the ground, sweat dripping off of her forehead. Jake lays beside her, “Are you okay?”

“You left me Jake,” she says angrily. “I’m so sorry.” The other children watch the pallid boy rub the darker girl’s wavy hair. “Lillie, did something happen while you were alone?” Gwin questions, concerned for her friend. She runs her fingers through her blue hair and sits down beside the red-headed Japanese-American cradling his new love interest.

“No, I just panicked, because I was alone. Didn’t any of you pay attention to the description of my disorder?” Lillie almost shouts, she’s still freaking out. Ethan chimes in, “I panicked too, but that’s because I panic for no reason sometimes. I overthink myself into a panic attack.” Ethan sits across from Lillie. “I had a flashback,” Clive joins in the little circle of teenages starting to form. Miyo is the only one who stands left. Gwin doesn’t realize that Miyo doesn’t know when she’s mean, or any other toxic emotion. Just because she knows what disorder she has, doesn’t mean she knows where and when it exactly affects you. “Miyo come and sit with us,” Gwin offers with a genuine smile on her face.  After Miyo sits beside Gwin, Jake speaks up, “I need to explain the whole ghost and schizophrenic thing.” The vibration of Jake’s voice soothes Lillie from before. She’s never in her whole life ever felt this close to someone, and had such a strong liking for someone, and it’s with the biggest jerk in school. You never really know someone until you learn a few things about them, instead of listening to other people talk about them. You need to experience their presence yourself.

“You all know how schizophrenia is like voices in your head?” Jake asks the group and they all nod. “Yeah, we’ve heard the description,” Miyo states, a little snippy. Gwin immediately hits her leg and she stops talking. These tiny mood swings were nothing compared to how violent Miyo’s behavior could get with her disorder.

“Anyway, these ghost are like my voices. The nurse makes me angry and like full with a desire to kill. Now, with the little boy I’ve been sweet and understanding, and I miss people in my life.” Jake awkwardly chuckles, the chuckles get even louder and they turn into tears. “Jake what’s wrong?” Lillie sits up and looks at him. “It’s just so fucking stupid we’re in a group circle explaining what recent attacks, or visions we’ve had. We’re teenagers in an asylum, we’re falling in love with each other, and slowly going insane. This sounds like a stupid T.V show or game show.” Everyone stays silent, deep in their own thoughts. Miyo misses her fathers. She knows her one would make a joke to lighten up the mood, “I think it would be called, “Fall in Love or Fall Insane.” She chuckles softly. Gwin laughs and stares at Miyo. The pale hands of the dark-haired girl reach up and wipe the tears from the brown eyes of Gwin. “We’ll find a way out of here guys. And then after this hell we’ll get a milkshake together.”

“That sounds so good right now,” Ethan says, his head lying on Clive’s shoulder. The two look absolutely cute together. Clive chuckles and rubs Ethan’s hands. Jake stares out the cracks of the window boards, “It’s about to get dark, we should all find a place to sleep, but close together so if anyone starts freaking out, or another ghost shows up, we’ll be able to fight together.”

The kids all sleep on the third floor, the hallway down from the nursery. The children decide to choose two rooms to sleep in, boys in one, girls in the other.

“Y’all ready to sleep very uncomfortablely?’ Miyo questions, sounding a little less sarcastic and more angry. Gwin merely chuckles and tries brushing the cobwebs from her blanket. Lillie laughs with them, and for the first time since the Halloween party she felt sorta safe.