Anguish

3.

Zain Bills |Zai|

"These yams is good as hell, ma." I smacked on my Sunday meal that my mother made.

"I don't like yams, grandma." Zola picked at the ones on her plate with her fork.

"Give them to me." I reached for her plate only to get my hand smacked.

"No, she's gonna sit there and at least try it. How do you know if you don't like something if you haven't tried it?"

"Because I know what I like." She mumbled.

"You don't have to eat it."

"That's your problem." She pointed at me. "You spoil her too much. Try it, Zola."

Zola reluctantly picked up her fork and ate some. She kept eating it so I'll assume she liked it.

"See, that's what you have to do with these children. Gotta be firm."

I spoil Zola because she's my little girl and I have to play both roles like my mom did. Zola doesn't have a mother in her life so I try to be that soft, overly affectionate side for her. Sometimes I'm just more soft I guess.

Me, I didn't have a father growing up so my mom was hard on me because she didn't want me to go down the wrong road. She was very strict and that lead to me being rebellious a lot of the time.

But I still love and respect my mom for all that she's done for me and Zola. Without her I don't think I would be the man I am now.

"You need me to help you with the dishes?" I asked my mom when she took me and Zola's clean plates. Zola was probably somewhere getting ready for a nap.

"No, I got this." She glanced over at me. "When are you going to get you a woman to cook you a Sunday meal? You can't keep walking around here depressed."

"I'm not depressed, ma. Why do you bring this up every time I'm over here?"

"When's the last time you've been on a date, Zain?" She dried her hands on a towel and leaned on the counter.

"I don't know."

"What happened with Faith wasn't your fault. You know that, right?"

"No, it was."

She sighed, "It's been seven years."

"And you're not going to force me to date or commit myself to anyone." Now I was getting irritated. She doesn't have to deal with this, I do.

"I'm not forcing you to do anything, Zain. I'm giving you the push that you need. You're looking for another girl like Faye and I'm sorry to break it to you, but you're not going to."

"Alright, ma."

"I put you in counseling and you stopped going-"

"And I'm not going back. I don't need a stranger to tell me how to feel or how to cope with my trauma."

She stared at me for a moment before just shaking her head and dropping the conversation.

"You know I just want to see you happy, right?"

"Yes. I know." I kissed her on her forehead to let her know I wasn't mad.

Genesis Bailey|Benji|

"Ooh, can I have this Genny?" Delilah pointed at the barbie in the toy aisle when I finally found her.

"Delilah, what did I tell you about walking off? Do you want to get snatched up?" I grabbed her arm and pulled her along with me.