Teach Me How to Love You

Lesson 7- How to talk to girls

"Oh. My. God."

Before me stood the most beautiful thing in the world. It was tall, majestic and made of wood. It had exceptional detail and looked absolutely amazing.

And it was in a tree.

"Is this good enough?" Colton asked me.

"It's absolutely perfect," I said.

I gazed at the amazing treehouse before me. It was in the biggest oak tree in Colton's backyard. It had a wrap around porch with a rope ladder leading up to it. There were two chairs and a coffee table set up on the porch with small decorations on them. There were a few windows around the whole treehouse too.

"It looks like something out of treehouse masters," I said as Colton and I walked up the ladder.

"Thanks," Colton said.

"Did you build this?"

"Yeah. Of course my..." suddenly Colton paused and I knew why.

"My brother helped me," Colton finished, painfully.

"Ahh well you guys did a wonderful job."

"Yeah."

We walked around the house to the door. Colton opened it and I immediately was in awe. Again.

There was a mini kitchen with a small fridge and everything. There was a little hallway the led to a room with a day bed against a window. It was boyish but still cool. Connected to the kitchen was a 'school room' with a chalk board on the wall. There were a couple of desks in front if the chalk board and a teacher's desk behind them. Kind of like a classroom.

"Before Jack went into the military, we had trouble with school so my mom had us set up a 'classroom' in the treehouse, so she could teach us and help us study," Colton said, reminiscing.

"And now you're the smartest kid in high school and you're about to be the hottest," I said lightning the mood a little.

Colton laughed and said,"Well I figured if you were 'teaching' me stuff this was the perfect place."

"It's more than perfect." I admired the treehouse one last time before saying, "Alright sit down and let's get to work."

---

"So the first thing I'm gonna teach you is how to talk to girls," I said writing on the chalk board.

Colton nodded his head as he said, "Ok."

"I know you might be thinking well talking to girls is so easy but not as much as you think," I said. "The players at school just make it look easy but it's really hard as mess and takes a lot of practice. It's the same with girls too."

Colton nodded his head again. I pulled up a chair across from Colton and put my elbows on his desk.

"Ok I'm gonna ask you some questions to see what you know about girls and talking to them kinda of like teachers do all the time."

Colton nodded his head once again. He looked a little nervous and to be honest I was too. I was just hoping Colton wasn't completely clueless.

"Ok if you were going to flirt with a girl how would you approach her?"

"Um... I'd walk up to her?" Colton said like a question.

I sighed and said,"Yes you would walk up to her but what would you say?"

"Oh, um... hi?"

"Um alright," I said. "Ok next question. What would be one of your flirt lines when talking to a girl."

"My what?"

"Flirt line. As in what would you say when your flirting with a girl?"

"Oh. Um," Colton said, deep in thought. "Oo. I know. Are you from Tennessee cause your the only ten I see."

Colton had a huge smile on his face as if he was very proud of his flirt line.

"Oh God," I muttered as I put my head in my hand.

"I'm sorry was that wrong? Cause that's really the only flirt line I know," Colton said.

"That really can't be considered as a flirt line."

"Oh well can I answer again?"

"No!" I said kinda quickly. "We're moving on."

Colton nodded his head and said,"Ok."

"Say you liked me and wanted to compliment me. What would you say?"

"I'd say that you have beautiful hair. It is the most prettiest and rarest color of red I've ever seen."

"Aww! Thanks!" I said brightening. Maybe Colton wasn't as bad as I thought he was.

"Next question. If you wanted to break up with a girl how would you tell her?"

"Ok well I'd tell her I'm sorry but we need to break up and then I would explain why to her."

"Great!" I said getting prouder of his answers by the second. "Ok last question. How would you show a girl how much you love her?"

"Um I'd tell her 'I love you."

When I actually thought Colton was doing good he fails the most important question of all.

"No you're completely wrong. You have to do something special for her," I said.

"Oh um then what do I do?" he asked.

"You know what. Let's just start from the beginning. Question 1 was if you were going to flirt with someone how would you approach her and you said say hi." Colton nodded his head in agreement.

"Yes you can say hi but if you really want to get her attention you say things like 'Hey beautiful' or 'Sup babe' if you want to be cool. And always look at her like she is the most beautiful girl ever so she feels special and plus it lets a girl know that you don't just wanna have sex. Most guys like that look at girls as if their tools and not human beings and that's just wrong," I said.

Colton nodded his head, soaking up every word I was saying. He seemed pretty determined to do this.

"Now, question 2 was what is one of your flirt lines when talking to a girl and you said something so shameful I can't even repeat it."

Colton hung his head down, a little embarrassed.

"When you flirt you have to say the right things. Nothing cheesy at all. Say things like 'You look really pretty today' or 'I love the way you laugh. It sounds like honey.' It's like throwing out little compliments to her. And there are different ways to act flirty. Like you might occasionally shoulder bump her or bump her knee 'accidentally.' You could also put your arm around her or lend her your jacket when she's cold. And be exceptionally nice to her by doing things that she wants even though you might not want to."

Colton nodded his head and I moved on to the last few questions. Finally Colton seemed to be getting the hang of it because he seemed to be getting even more confident by the minute. I gave him examples and advice on many things and when I finished I had to test him.

"So are you ready to go practice?" I asked him.