Direct Messages| Reddie

(11)

Eddie's POV

"Is it ok if B-Bev spends the n-night? I f-figured since your c-c-closest with her next to R-Rich you'd want to s-see her or s-something" Bill asks.

"Sure" I say picking at my deepest scar.

"Eddie, are y-you sure you d-don't want me t-to call R-R-Richie?" 

"Don't call him. Please"

"Ok. D-do you want s-something to eat or dr-drink?"

"No"

"Wh-what are you d-doing?" he asks when he sees what I'm doing. I look down and see I've broke the skin and I'm bleeding. I smile a little to myself at the sight. I quickly force it away when I realize how crazy I must look.

"Nothing" I mumble and pull my sleeve down. He grabs my hand lightly and moves the sleeve to see my wrist. I'm actually bleeding a little worse than I thought I was. It's not bad, there's no more than just a few drops of blood peeking out.

"I-I'll be r-right back" he says and leaves the room. He come back a few minutes later with some medical tape and bandages. He wraps up my wrist tapes it down. 

"It wasn't even bad, Bill" 

"I know b-but later you'll s-s-start freaking out ab-about diseases" 

"Ok" I say. He sits down and goes back on Tumblr. I stare at my feet for what feels like a few seconds but is actually like 10 minutes.

"S-stop" Bill says and grabs both of my hands.

"What?" I ask.

"Y-you were do-doing it again" he says softly. My old counselor used to get annoyed whenever I did this. Bill sounds kind and patient. Kind of like what a mom is supposed to sound like I guess.

"Oh. I didn't even realize I was" I mumble. He goes over to his sock drawers and pulls out 2 clean socks. He puts them over my hands and tapes them to my skin.

"I-it's so if you st-start doing it a-again, you won't b-be able to h-hurt yourself" he explains.

"Oh" I mumble. The door opens and Bev comes in.

"Hey, Bill" she says and gives him a quick hug after putting my stuff down.

"Hey, Eddie. How ya doing?" she asks sitting next to me. I shrug.

"N-no pity l-looks" Bill says.

"What?" she asks.

"H-his rule. N-not mine" he says.

"Oh. Can I talk to him alone for a second?" she asks. He nods and leaves the room.

"What's going on?" she asks.

"I don't know" I say.

"Eddie, I went through the same thing a few years ago"

"I don't feel like me sometimes"

"It's hard to have fun. You can't go swimming or wear short sleeves because they can't see. You have moments where you feel like you're going to die"

"Yeah"

"Told you I went through the same thing"

"When did you start feeling normal again?"

"It took time. I told Richie what was going on and he gave me a hug and said everything was gonna be ok. He helped a lot"

"I don't like worrying him. He saw me have a breakdown and he looked terrified"

"Because someone he cares for was in pain. Not because you were scaring him"

"I don't wanna do that to him"

"It's your choice but even though Richie can be an asshole and a trashmouth, he's one of the most caring people I've met. He's so protective of everyone in the group even if he doesn't show it"

"I'll tell him when I'm feeling better. Right now I just want...I don't know"

"A hug?" she asks with a smile. I nod and she hugs me. Her hugs are always like the ones you give someone if you haven't seen them in awhile. She's just so warm and inviting.

~<>~<>~<>~

Bev's POV

Eddie cried for a bit and fell asleep. I think the crying was just from being so emotionally drained. I close the door as quietly as possible and go downstairs where Bill is sitting on the couch with Georgie.

"Hey" I say sitting next to them on the couch.

"How's E-Eddie?" Bill asks.

"Sleeping"

"What'd you gu-guys talk about?"

"I convinced him to tell Richie when he's feeling better"

"Oh g-g-good"

"Bill?"

"Y-yes?"

"Why are there socks on his hands?"

"He k-kept making hims-self bleed"

"Oh"

"I t-told him I w-wouldn't call Richie b-but I feel like I-I should"

"Yeah. I will"

"S-Stan just texted me. H-he said that R-Richie feels like Ed-Eddie is hiding s-s-something from him"

"He's not wrong"

"Call R-Richie" he says. I get out my phone and call Richie. I put him on speaker phone because I can't be bothered to lift the phone up to my ear and hold it there.

Trashmouth: Ah hello dear, Bevvie! What can I help you with?

Me: You wanna know Eddie is hiding from you?

Trashmouth: Wait, he actually is? I thought I was just being over dramatic 

Me: Yes. Get to Bill's
Trashmouth: Is he like...sleeping with someone?
Me: No, get over here
Trashmouth: He doesn't like me anymore, does he?
Me: Richie?
Trashmouth: What
Me: It's not about you. It's about him
Trashmouth: Is he ok?
Me: No

"Bitch hung up on me" I say staring at my phone.

"Well wh-when you say sh-shit like that. He prr-probably thinks Eddie has ca-cancer or something" Bill says.

"Shut up" I say. About 20 minutes later we hear rapid knocks on the door.

"Y-you freaked him out. You c-can get the d-d-door" he says. I roll my eyes and get up. I open the door and see a very worried Richie Tozier.

"Where is he? What happened?" he asks.

"Sleeping. Sit down and I'll tell you" I say. He sits down and waits for me to start talking.

"He's not getting better, Rich. He misses cutting a lot. Bill told me he was talking about death and how it sounded peaceful or something. He sounded like he wanted it" I explain. Richie puts one hand over his mouth and takes he deep breath before moving it down to his chin and looking up at me with teary eyes.

"Where is he?" he asks putting his hand down in his lap.

"Bill's room" I say.