Direct Messages| Reddie

(17)

Eddie slept for another two hours before waking up.

"Hey" I say. He squeezes me a little harder than he was, like he's making sure I'm real, "you up for some more visitors?" I ask. He shrugs and I text them the room number. A few minutes the door opens.

"Hey, Eddie" Bev says and walks over to his side of the bed. He puts his arms up and she leans down so he can hug her. He does the same to Bill and Stan.

"We're glad you're ok" Stan says. Eddie looks down plays with the bandage around his wrist.

"W-we missed y-you. A lo-lot" Bill says. Eddie nods his head slowly. This is weird, why isn't he saying anything?

"You ok?" I whisper to him. He shrugs and continues playing with the bandage. Be, Stan, and Bill look at me questioningly. I mouth 'I don't know'.

"Eddie, do you want us to come back later?" Bev asks in a soothing voice. He stays still for a few seconds like he's thinking then nods.

"O-ok. We'll s-see you l-l-later" Bill says.

"We'll check on you later" Stan says placing his hand on Eddies knee. Eddie jerks away and Stan quickly moves his hand away. They leave and I look over at Eddie who is still playing with the bandage.

"Are you ok?" I ask. He ignores me. I'll take that as a no, "did Stan hurt you? When he touched you?" I ask. He shakes his head no. "Do you not want me to touch you?" I ask. He picks up my hands and starts playing with fingers instead of his bandage. I guess that's a no.

"Do you just need some time?" I ask. He nods and rests his head on my shoulder.

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Eddie's 72 hour hold is up and he can come home. The doctor told us that CPS wants to place Eddie in another home for the time being. I texted my mom and she called CPS and got them to place Eddie with us. He still hasn't say anything to anyone else. Sometimes he'll say something to me but it's usually not much.

"Are you ready?" I ask and hold out my hand. He nods and takes it. I pick up our bags and go down to the lobby where Stan is waiting for us. The others are back in Derry. Stan came to pick us up. He leads out to where he parked my truck and we all get in. Eddie is curled into my side with his eyes closed but I don't think he's asleep yet. I run my fingers through his hair, it's so soft. After a few minutes I feel him fall asleep.

"Has he said anything to you?" Stan asks in a hushed voice.

"Sometimes when we're alone. No conversations though" I say in the same voice.

"They really fucked with him"

"Yeah"

"Bev really wanted to throw a welcome home party but I told her not to. With how he is now I don't think he'd enjoy it"

"He hated parties before the conversion therapy bullshit so I can't imagine it going well"

"Knowing Bev she probably didn't listen"

"I love her but if she did I'm kicking her in the dick"

"She doesn't-"

"I'm kicking her in the dick"

"Ok, Rich. You do that"

"I will"

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We get back to my quiet house. No party, thank God. I carry my little sleeping spaghetti up to my room and lay him down on my bed. I pull a blanket over him and go downstairs. I grab two pepsi's from the fridge and sit on the couch with Stan.

"He sleeps a lot" Stan says.

"Yeah. He's never up for than an hour at a time" I say.

"Did the doctors say anything about it?"

"They think he might have PTSD and it's presenting itself like that"

"He could get PTSD from that?"

"They did some terrible things to him. He hasn't told me everything"

"Do you think they would try to get a girl to...you know....like rape the gay out of him?"

"I want to say no but the answer is probably yes" I sigh leaning my head back.

"When he wakes up you should try to get him to talk" he says.

"I'll try"

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It's been like an hour. Stan and I are watching Friends. I hear a floorboard creak and look over to see Eddie walking into the room. He sits next to me and curls into my side like usual.

"Hey. Sleep ok?" I ask. He shakes his head, "another nightmare?" I ask. He nods and I rub his arm.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Stan asks. Eddie shakes his head no.

"Are you gonna eat anything today?" I ask. He shrugs. He hasn't eaten in two days.

"I gotta go. I'll see you guys later" Stan says.

"Bye" I say and he leaves.

"Can I ask you something?" I ask. Eddie shrugs.

"Stan said something that hasn't been able to leave my mind. He was asking me about your time at the church. He wanted to know if they got a girl come in to....try to turn you straight....with her body? Did they force you to have sex with her" I ask. He hesitates but slowly nods. My eyes starting stinging and I swallow a sob threatening to escape.

"I'm so so sorry, Eds" I say and move so I can wrap both arms around him.

"I don't wanna go back" he says just loudly enough for me to here.

"You won't. I promise"

"I'm scared"

"I know but you're safe here"

"I love you" he says. What?! He loves me!? We've been dating for two months....is that enough time to fall in love? Do I love him? Of course I do, who wouldn't! But if I admit it then that means that this is real. This relationship is real and there's so many ways I could fuck it up.....fuck it.

"I love you too, Eds" I say.

"Don't call me that" he says burying his face in the crook of my neck.