7/28/18
Are you still a Virgin?
When you've let them see
Parts of you that are only touched by You?
They may not have touched them,
But still,
Violated is how you feel.
You look back at the conversations,
Wishing you could just forget them.
Strangers on the internet,
Why is it so hard..
To just forget?
You swear you won't do it again,
You swear it's the last time
You give your body freely
Even though you aren't touched.
The next emotional breakdown
Makes it once again your crutch.
Your friends don't know
What you do when you can't sleep at night.
They just know you can't sleep.
They don't think anything happens,
So they leave you be.
Your mind is being molested
By the words inside your head.
Your body is no longer sacred,
You've shown it to more than one.
You may have not been touched,
But you feel worthless.
You feel crushed.
If this is what life is like,
I don't know if I want to live.
If I have to be addicted to
A drug, or a feeling of bliss
In order to live with myself for
What's inside my head,
Or what I only THINK I want inside my bed,
I don't want to live.
If I have to condemn my life to this.
My friends..
They don't know I do this.
My friends..
They can't help me through this.
They don't understand
How I crave to be held in someone's arms.
How I crave to just be..
Loved.
But loved is not how I feel.
What I feel is a concoction of lust,
And misguided trust
That cannot decipher the false
From the real.
Adultery is a sin.
So should I,
Be six feet under, then?
Yes.
Yes, I should.
************
POET'S NOTE
Hey guys.
Sorry, I'm not gonna spam you right now.
Maybe later though ;)
Anyways, I still havent sorted through my stuff on Google Docs, but HOPEFULLY I'll have it to you guys soon. I've been focusing my energy on getting a job flexible enough to work around my upcoming busy school schedule, and after school starts you KNOW I will probably be the LAST to update ANYTHING. *cough* my miraculous book *cough*
...
Im a baaaad procrastinator.. you know??
...
ANYWAYS. I love you all. Hugs and kisses!
-Raene-
PS. YOU NEED TO FREAKING WATCH BRAD MONDO ON YOUTUBE! HE'S AWESOME AND I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!
haha. Oof. That is aggressive. Seriously though. He's beautiful. Lol. He's got me inspired to #livemyextralife. Btw. If anyone is willing to buy me his freaking *$40 Live Your Extra Life hoodies* God.. so expensive.. I will love you for FOREVER AND A HALF. (I want the black one. I dont rock a lot of pink like the Brad Master can. Mmkay? Mmkay. *hairflip*)
...
I cut my hair..
Hairflips don't work anymore..
Screw it.
*DRAMATIC HAIR FLIP BECAUSE GOSH DARNIT MY HAIR WILL FLIIIIPP*
Now I'm satisfied 🙂
Peace Out Beautiful Babes!
-Raene-
