Strawberry Blonde

十九

Finally Monday morning had come meaning Bee and I were on our usual stroll to school.

I lied to her yesterday when she asked me why I left and if I was okay. I told her I was fine as always and had to help dad with some house lighting thing and she actually believed me.

Unless she's just tricking me into thinking that I think she believes me, I definitely stepped up my lying game. Something I'm not proud of but it sure is useful.

She was especially quiet on the walk to school, she didn't even say bye to me when we parted ways for first period.

After handing in my homework at the end of class it hit me that next period Laurence would be there.

A feeling of dread and familiar embarrassment struck me.

Should I just skip class ?

Ugh but that would ruin my perfect attendance.

The bell sounded and I sluggishly walked to second period where Laurence sat in the seat next to mine.

Ms.Gravoski came in and I tapped her shoulder.
" Hey Ms.G, is it okay if I sit in front of the class today ? I uhh forgot my to put in my contacts." I lied.

" Well of course ! You can take Stevie's seat for today." She said.

Whew, I felt the pressure release from my chest as I sat and stared at the board.

She started her lesson and as the class went on I fought every temptation I had to turn around and look at Laurence.

The second bell rang and I was one of the first out the classroom bobbing and weaving my way through the crowd on my way to third period.

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The lunch bell sounded and I made it to my locker.

That's odd, no Charolette ? Today must be a good day. Could I even call it a good day without Laurence though ?

I grabbed my lunch bag and sluggishly walked to the cafeteria and sat at my original table.

Before I could zip open my bag Laurence plopped himself in front of me peering into my soul.

" So are you mad at me ?" He asked.

" What for ?" I said breaking eye contact opening my lunch bag.

He leaned in forward whispering.
" Well at my house on Saturday...the kiss...I mean I didn't know for sure about you but I seen how you got uncomfortable that Friday when I said I wasn't into guys. The kiss kinda just confirmed my theory..."

I felt like all spotlights were being shot at me. The imaginary heat making me sweat as I stayed quiet unpacking my lunch.

" Hassan I don't care if you're gay or bi or anything of the sort, I just want to know if you're okay ?"

It broke my heart for him to care so much. In the short time we've known each other I completely fallen for him and he's out of my reach.

I sighed loudly looking back up to him.
" I'm not ! I was just curious that's all, I felt a moment and took it to experiment."

I lied. I was slowly beginning to hate myself the more I stared at him.

He wore grief on his face.
" Oh..." the depth in his voice had a subtle sadness to it.

I questioned it and was ready to swallow my pride and just come out to him but Charolette came and sat next to me.

" So Hassan ! Halloween is tomorrow and you told me you were gunna sit with us today."

I raised my brow and most of the jocks and other popular kids sat at the table surrounding Laurence and I.

" So about that date for the schools dance are you in ?" She asked.

Side conversations from the jocks commenced as she waited for my answer.

Laurence stared at me squinting. It's like he was studying me.

I averted from his gaze and turned to her.
" Sure..."

" Great !" She squealed grabbing my hand.

Laurence got up from the table sucking his teeth.

" Wait ! You're also invited to my after party I'm throwing at my house. Can't have a Halloween party without the freak of the school ? Just don't bring your psycho brother okay ?" Charolette said to Laurence as the jocks and cheerleaders laughed.

He turned back shooting an intense glare at me.
" Yeah...I'll be there." He said through gritted teeth before walking away.

I felt paralyzed in my seat.

This week is not going to end well is it ?