Anything For Dean Winchester

Chapter 4

Dean actually awoke to feel rested and rejuvenated for the first time in weeks. He sat up, stretched, and threw his legs over the edge of the bed. After rubbing his eyes with the palms of his hands to straighten out his blurred sight he stood up, grabbing a black t-shirt and a pair of blue jeans that were thrown aimlessly on the floor. In a habit, he began looking around the room. He noticed nothing different except the light in the lamp was shattered on the floor. He remembered turning the light off but could not remember ever hearing it brake. Then he noticed the tan trench coat laying on the armchair in the corner.
"What the hell!" Dean said to himself as he walked carefully around the glass and picked up the coat.
"Cas! Where are you!?" Dean yelled.

After his sister's visit, Castiel watched over Dean the rest of the morning. When Dean began to stir in bed he left in quite a hurry. He did not want Dean to catch him watching over him. He was sitting in the empty Bunker kitchen and had just poured himself a cup of fresh coffee when he heard Dean's yell. Dean's voice was filled with annoyance and a hint of anger. Castiel jumped to his feet just as Dean entered the room holding his trench coat in his hands.
"What the Hell Cas!? Why is your coat in my room and what happened to my light!?"
Dean shoved the coat into his chest.
Castiel was at a loss for words. His mind had been clouded with thoughts of the events that took place. He intended to clean the mess up before he left and he had not noticed until it was pointed out that he did not have his trench coat on. He did not want to lie but if he told him the truth he risked making him upset. Risked being told to leave. Risked his trust with Dean being broken. Castiel was snapped back to reality by Dean's hand on his shoulder.
"You ok? Hey, Cas?"
Dean's voice was now calm and he seemed concerned. His eyebrows meet in the middle of his face.
"Yes, Dean. I am ok."
"Then tell me what's going on."
"I don't know exactly how."
"Cas has been using his grace to help you sleep." Sam interrupted from the doorway.
Castiel and Dean both turn their heads sharply to face Sam as he continued.
"You have been having nightmares for weeks, Dean. I asked Cas if he could help and he said he could. Cas has been easing your mind back to peaceful rest for about a week. It was my idea so don't be too mad at him."
Dean's jaw clenched and both his fists were balled at his sides. His eyebrows were back together.
Castiel did not know what Dean's reaction would be but he felt a weight lifted from his shoulders that he didn't realize had gotten so heavy. He hated keeping secrets and he especially hated keeping secrets from Dean.
Dean turned from Sam to Castiel.
"You have been using your angel mojo on me for weeks...Why?"
Castiel wanted to tell Dean the entire truth. The truth about his feelings for him and not wanting to see him in pain. He thought he could be brave and tell him...but his courage faltered. Castiel went with a half-truth instead.
"You would scream in your sleep. Most nights we could never understand anything. Just screams. Then about a week ago you screamed my name."
Castiel felt a shade of red rise to his cheeks.
"You know I always answer when you call."
Dean's neck and face flushed a light shade of pink.
"I called your name?" Dean almost choked on his words.
"Help me Cas. To be exact." Sam said with an unsettling smirk.
Not even glancing at Sam, Dean took a large step closer to Castiel. Lowered his head and said in a soft, low voice. Almost inaudible.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
Castiel lowered his voice to the same low tone. He could not look Dean in the eyes. Embarrassment, shame, humiliation, discomfort. He could not decide what emotion best suited himself at the moment.
"I didn't want you to reject my help. You needed it. I also didn't want you to be upset with me and ask me to leave again."
Dean's face changed quickly. He had a hurt look upon it now. Castiel tilted his head in confusion. Not understanding Dean's expression.
"You think I would make you leave?"
Dean felt a sinking feeling in his chest. They had not talked about the situation with Gadreel pretending to be Ezekiel and they never mentioned Dean telling Castiel he could not stay at the Bunker. It hurt both of them far too much to bring up in casual conversation.
"Cas the last time was different. It was to save Sammy's life. You can't honestly hold that against me. I would never ask you to leave again. Never. Here with us, this is your home."
Castiel felt his heart warm but did not have time to speak before Dean changed the subject.
"How did my light get busted?"
"I settled your mind but I think my grace surged and the electricity was too much. The bulb could not handle it. I meant to clean it up. I am sorry."
"It's ok. It's just a light bulb. Wait, how exactly do you get my mind to settle?"
"Usually on a decent night, it only takes a little of my grace. I place my hand on your face and you are calm in minutes."
"A hand on my face on a decent night. What about on a non-decent night?"
"It takes a great deal of my grace and hours."
"You have been doing this every night?"
He finally looks Dean in the eyes. He does not feel that Dean is annoyed or angry any longer and his facial expression has relaxed.
"Every night that you needed me I was there for you," Castiel says with a nod.

Sam stepped forward heading for the table. "You are handling this better than I thought you would."
"Oh I'm still plenty pissed off at you both but when I woke up this morning I felt different. Refreshed. Recharged. Better than I have in a very long time. If your angel mojo helped that much I will take it. Just don't keep crap like this a secret. Especially when it's about me being touched by an angel!"
Dean chuckled. He was apparently the only one that appropriated his joke.
Sam had a questioning look when he met Castiel's eyes.
"You felt different this morning? Did you do something different this time Cas?"
Castiel's mind started to run wild with all the memories of that early morning. The two men's souls connecting, Dean not fighting his soul like he did his grace, his sister's visit, his summons to appear before The Council. All at once Castiel felt incredibly stupid! While talking to and about Dean he had forgotten all about his summons. He had only ten days to figure out what had happened. He exited the kitchen and made his way to the library without saying as much as a single word to the Winchester's.
Dean and Sam looked at each other with confusion as they rushed directly behind the angel trying to keep up.
Castiel propelled the library doors open with impressive strength. He desperately started searching the shelves for anything on angels souls, human souls, angel and human connections, anything he thought might be linked to the strange situation he found himself in.
Dean and Sam entered the library. Stopping suddenly when they set eyes on a rather distraught Castiel shuffling through books and shelves with great hast.
"What is going on Cas?"
Dean said. Using his worried voice again. Dean took a step closer to Castiel, reaching out a hand to place on his shoulder when in a rush of messy black hair and pushy arms shoved Dean out of the library and closed the doors behind him. He turned the lock and looked at Sam. Over Dean's angry voice and loud protests to be let back in Castiel told Sam of the events that happened early that morning. Sam stayed silent and listened intently as he told his shortened versions of the story. The only information he left out was his confession of love.

"Please help me, Sam! It's life or death for me. I need help to find something, anything, that I can use to plead my case."
"You know I'm going to help you but we might get further if there were three digging for information, not just two." Sam darted his eyes to the door with a slight head tilt.
"Dean does not need to be involved."
"Not involved!? Cas he's half the reason your life is in danger. You are going to need both of us on this one."
"You were going to be a lawyer and you are the smartest human I have ever encountered. We can do this."
"It would be easier to tell him. He's worried about you. Plus what if we need him. Like a witness or something."
"What if he ends up hurt, in pain, or what if The Council thinks he was in on whatever happened and sentences him to death as well. No."
A thunderous kick at the door.
"Dammit, Cas let me in!! Sammy, I know you can hear me, let me in!!"
A sudden silence fell on Dean as he turned his back and slid down the door and took a seat on the cold concrete floor. If Castiel would not listen he would get his attention in a way he knew the angel could not ignore. Dean intertwined his fingers and bowed his head. Then he started to pray...
"Cas, I don't know what's going on but I want to help. I want to understand. I want to be here for you like you are always there for me. What could you possibly be able to tell Sammy and not me? Did I do something? I'm sorry. I won't be mad and I won't tell you to leave. Please Cas, just talk to me. I'm not leaving from here until you do."
Castiel listened carefully. Hanging on every word. Even though it was a prayer he could feel the hurt inside of Dean. He knew bringing Dean into this could hurt him as well but he decided to deal with that as it came. If it came. Knowing Dean was blaming himself for unknown happenings was causing Castiel just as much discomfort as Dean. He had to take that feeling away from Dean and himself immediately. He walked to the door and unlocked it. As Castiel pulled open the door he was greeted with Dean tumbling into the room. Legs in the air, falling directly on his back.
Sprawled out on the floor with Castiel looking down at him, Dean smiled.
"I knew you couldn't resist my prayers."
Standing over Dean looking down into his luscious green eyes, Castiel could not resist the urge to grin.
"Anything for Dean Winchester."