Book of Eddsworld Trash

Hello, yes 911?

Tom and Tord were in the middle of fighting, when Tom suddenly stopped and took out his phone. "What are you doing Jehovah?....." Tord tilted his head as he asked the question. Tom suddenly dialled a number on his phone and put it on speaker, a woman on the other side of the phone spoke. "911, What's your emergency?" Tom was keeping his eyes on Tord as he turned his head slightly towards the phone. "Hello, yes 911? I would like my cell to have a window." Tord nervously took a step back, Tom took a step towards him. The woman on the other side of the phone seemed to flinch, "Uhm Sir, I don't seem to understand?" the woman said. Tom cleared his throat and clarified to the woman, "I'm about to commit a murder." What he was about to do.

The woman had a very nervous voice, not as calm as she was before "S-Sir you shouldn't do that!" Tord started to back up slowly, then took steps back slightly faster as Tom walked closer to him. Tom smirked, "Just send the police." Tom threw the phone while the woman was mid-sentence, after hitting the button to end the call. Tord backed into a wall, he finally looked away from Tom for a split second to see any places he could run to. That was his first mistake, when he looked back Tom was literally not even a foot away from him. Tord gulped and stared at Tom straight in the.......eyes?.......sure. Tord pressed his back further into the wall, he stared directly at Tom. "Yeah, you're fucked." Tord booked it to the kitchen after Tom said those three words.

Tom followed after him, Tord ran into the kitchen, Tom came after him. As they ran around the kitchen, Tom grabbed one of the biggest, and probably sharpest, knives that was in the kitchen. Tord tried to make a break for the doorway of the kitchen, Tom then sped up. Tom tackled Tord from behind, making them both tumble, when they stopped Tom was above Tord. He was staring Tord dead in the eye, Tord didn't break eye contact, fearing if he might Tom would stab him. Tom moved the knife closer to Tord's face, he slowly ran the side of the cold blade across his cheek. Tord shivered from how cold it was, compared to how warm the room was. That or he might be really warm because of the position they were in. Tom brought the blade up and held it above Tord's head, close to two inches away from his face.

Two policemen suddenly busted the door in, to find Tom pinning Tord to the ground with a knife just about two inches above his head. Tom put the knife behind his back within an instant, Tord looked up at the policemen. "Oh, hello..." Tom used the hand that didn't have a knife and waved at the policemen "Hello." The policemen both glanced at each other for a second then back at the two in front of them. "What did we..." the other policeman finished his sentence "Just walk in on?....". Both of the policemen weren't sure if they walked in on a murder attempt, or some rather......kinky......stuff. Tom cleared his throat, he stood up and helped, well more like forced, Tord to stand as well. "Well you see, me and my......Boyfriend. Here were about to do something, but then you came in."

Tord's face turned red, well, redder then it was before that is, "B-Boyfriend?!" Tom leaned closer to Tord's ear and whispered. "Roll with it. Or I will plunge the knife behind my back into yours." Tord silently gulped. Tord took a very deep breath for what he was about to say, and so he could say it with a straight face. "What are you and him doing barging into me, and my boyfriend's house?" Tord was miraculously able to say it with a straight face, which he was thankful for. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Tom's face gain a small red tint, probably not expecting Tord to say that of all things. Both of the policemen agreed silently that they had the wrong address and that they walked in on something they shouldn't of seen.

Both the policemen said "Sorry for barging in on you two, you may resume what you were previously doing." Then they both left, Tord was sweating nervously, after the realisation that he got rid of the two people who stopped him from getting killed by the person standing. Right. Next. To. Him. He glanced over at Tom, who was already looking at Tord, he sighed. "I'll let you live." Tord let out a giant sigh of relief, that was until Tom said, "That is, on one condition." Tord froze in place and looked at Tom, waiting for him to continue. Tom put his hand out to Tord, "We never speak of what happened here today to anyone.". Tord nodded "Agreed, also... We must never put each other in the situation of being the other's lover."

Tom nodded. "Agreed. Though I must say, you were pretty good at acting when we were in that situation." Tord shrugged "Weird talent, I guess." Tom and Tord both shook hands and agreed silently to forget that day completely. Though they both kept a small piece of the day in their minds. Both kept the timeframe of when Tom tackled Tord to when they agreed to never speak of that day again. They would always remember that specific timeframe on that day whenever they looked at each other. They both seemed to always keep that in their mind, it never seemed to disappear, ever.

. . .

Was that good?... I haven't written in a while, so I'm not fully sure.

I have a bunch of random ideas for some oneshots, so possibly be expecting some more to come, I guess?