Once Bitten, Twice Shy

byChapter 21 - Deep in the woods

Darina's POV

Chapter 21 - Deep in the woods

It was dark outside the pub-with the village as asleep as the woods that surrounded it. He was standing in the gloom of a stone building, his expressions grave and unreadable.

“Kieran, are you okay?”

“Feeling guilty?”He said without bothering to break a sweat."It’s a good sign, means you have a conscience.”

‘I’m sure we'd enjoy giving each other bloody noses and black eyes, right at this moment. But this is not the best place and time for an alley fight.”A quick glance around showed me that no one was around to hear us, but a fat, battle scarred cat in search for more food.

Kieran fisted his frustrated hands at his sides. I wondered how long it would take him to unfreeze. He’d certainly been cold enough throughout the afternoon and evening. Cool, aloof, distant.

"I think we'd better take a rain check."

"Rain check?"

"We should just call it a night and go home."He actually called it home, not the broom closet apartment he lived back in New York, but the old castle that I was hoping would be our home someday.

“I mean, I want to go back to New York.”But his mistake was already made, there was no recorrection to it. Maybe he knew that himself, and that‘s why he kept fighting like a terrier.

"Kieran."I hoped that my quiet voice held both remorse and compassion he wanted to hear."Don't snipe. Is that what you want, what you truly, really want?

“What if the answer is yes?”

With a sigh, I took his hands."If you want to be here in Romania with me, you can stay as long as you want. If you want to be somewhere else, you can go there. I’m letting you go.”

I made it sound so easy, so natural, though it was creating a gashing wound in my heart. I knew it would always be there to remind me that we almost had it all.

"Why?"He looked dizzy and startled, and though I couldn’t be sure I think I saw something like anger under the depth of his expression.

"Because you need it".I brought his hand to my lips, praying that it wouldn’t be the last time. "Because I love you."

His eyes darkened."By all that's holy, tell me if I can trust you.”Kieran muttered.

I was softening, but I didn't see any reason to make it easy. You  snooze you lose.

"I was your lover, Kieran, but never your partner. I won't settle for that, not even for you."I let out a quiet breath,studying him in the shifting light. "You had my heart in your hands," I murmured. "I can tell you, without Cornelia's power of foresight or anything, you'll never have another like it." 

"I believe you are under the impression that I have already had my say. And I don't think that I’m in any condition to listen to your outrageous accusations again. But I must tell you, what I’ve done I did because I’ve always loved you, and I always will. But I don’t think anyone can talk sense in to your addled brain. I’ll arrange a car to take you to the Henri Coandă air port,first thing in the morning. Let’s go now; I have to send a message to my pilot.”

As I slipped away from him I knew this was going to hurt me a lot .

“Darina?”

“It’s close to midnight, let’s go. You have a long way to travel tomorrow...”I said navigating down steep dirt steps that led towards the forest.