I saw a girl with a gun walking up to a couple. I saw Jay, and I saw myself. I tried to run to her. To shout out to her. But nothing. I just stood there, watching. I heard the girl speak, and saw her raise the gun.
“Jay is mine you bitch!”
I let out a blood curdling scream and shot up in bed. I felt a hand on mine and opened my eyes. Jay was sitting there. He crawled into the tiny hospital bed with me and wrapped his arms around me. “Its okay. It's okay.” He kissed my forehead and slowly rocked me back and forth. I tried to breathe normally, my doctor said it wasnt going to speed up my recovery if I was stressed out all the time.
“Deep breaths babe. In and out.” He coached me and I follow the instructions. In and out. In and out.
“It's over now. It's all over. Its going to be okay.” I hadnt noticed I was crying until he wiped the tears from my cheeks. We layed in bed bed and I fell back asleep, in the arms of the man that I loved.
-----2 months later------
I looked in the mirror and slowly traced the scar on my chest. The bullet had punctured my lung, but physically I had made a full recovery. It was the emotional trauma that I was still trying to work my way through. Everynight I had been having the same nightmare, the night of the shooting.
Jay had been at the hospital every single time he had a chance to fly out. It was amazing to wake up randomly and see him sitting next to me, or with his head sleeping on my bed beside me. I had been out of the hospital for about a month now, and the day I got home was the last day I had seen Jay. Until today. I was off to LA to see the boys, and spend the next 2 weeks there. I had been given the entire next month off of work. But honestly, I had enough money from the shooting settlement that I wouldnt have to go back to work for quite some time..
I fought the tears that threatened to spring to my eyes as I thought of the shooting. I was determined to stay strong, and to not let this hinder me for the rest of my life. I was going to get past this. I had to. I looked at myself in the mirror and put a smile on. I grabbed my computer and opened my twitter. The amount of love from the fanmily was incredible. I never realized how ridiculous your mentions could get until I could barely keep up with mine, and I understood how Kels and Nareesha could never possibly reply to everyone. And I was not even close to the amount of followers that they had. I snapped a quick goofy picture and tweeted it with the caption “Off to the airport to fly and on my way to LA to see my 5 favorite lads.” I stuffed my computer in my backpack and headed out the door.
The flight was smooth and before I knew it, I had landed in LA. I adjusted my backpack as I walked to the escalator on my way to the baggage claim. As the escalator went down, I began to see girls, everywhere. There were probably about 75 of them. I tried swallowed the lump in my throat and realized it was getting hard to breathe.
They were everywhere.
Why were they here.?
What did they want?
I forced myself to smile and slowly stepped off the escalator. The girls separated, right in half, leaving a sort of runway, and at the end, Jay stood there, holding a single rose. Seev, Tom, Max, and Nath were standing right behind him. All five of them with massive smiles on their faces. I dropped my backpack to the floor and took off running. Jay met me halfway and I jumped into his arms. Everything was in slow motion. It was just like the first day we kissed. He spun me in a circle and slipped. We crashed to the ground and I started to laugh uncontrollably. The girls started to clap and that only made me laugh harder. I kissed the tip of Jay's nose and rolled off of him, he got to his feet and helped me up. Once we were both standing he grabbed my hand and we bowed. Everyone was laughing and clapping.
I sprinted over to the boys and gave them each hugs, saving Tom for last. I gave Tom a huge bear hug.
"And how are you lovely?" i could feel the grin on his face with his cheek pressed to the top of my head.
"Im fighting. And Im staying strong for now." I replied.
In the last few months, he had become one of my closest friends, and I absolutely loved him. He was always there when I needed him. I didnt know it now, but I was going to need him. More than I ever imagined.
