Bad

five

i frantically explain to her who i was. she didnt even recognize me. "oh sweetie i'm sorry." "just put the gun down mom." i was more worried about her hurting herself. she placed the gun on the couch and came to hug me. what just happened? "mom how did you get a gun?!"

"oh i thought someone was after me." i sigh and sit her down on the couch. "mom no ones coming after you.. and i have a key to the house so if someone's coming in it's me i promise." ok considering where we live, that might not be true but i had to say it! i walk over and grab the gun. "mom i'm gonna go throw this out." she nods. "i'm sorry noah i don't know what i was thinking." she says, placing a hand on her forehead. "it's okay." i kiss her on the cheek to say bye and leave. i kind of forgot about everything and rushed to the gallagher house. i couldn't hold it in anymore. i let the tears fall while i walked.

i knock on the door praying it wasn't carl because i knew whoever it was i was gonna fall apart. to my luck it was carl, he opens the door to reveal me sobbing with a gun in my hand. he opens his eyes as wide as possible and looks at me expressing concern. he pulls me into a hug. "i'm sorry i didn't know where else to go." "shh it's okay."

about thirty minutes later i find myself sitting next to carl on the couch, wrapped in a blanket. "if you wanna talk about it.." "my mom didn't recognize me." he looks at me sympathetically which i hated. the thing is, no matter how many times we fight, he'll still be there. like a family. he lifts my chin up. "i don't know how anyone could forget you noah. you're the most amazing, beautiful, kind, funny girl i know." i felt my cheeks getting redder as he removed his hand from my chin and hugged me. i didn't know it, but it was exactly what i needed.

debs comes down the stairs, "hey noah." she realizes i was hugging her brother, "what the hell?" i remove myself from carl, debbie notices i was crying. she immediately looks at carl, "what the hell did you do?" carl puts is hands up in surrender, "nothing!" well not nothing but we'll talk about this later. "he didn't do anything. i'm pretty sure my mom is starting to forget me debs." she walks around to the front of the couch and pulls me into a bear hug. "i'm sorry noah."

the three of us find ourselves watching movies, i text my mom, "i'll be home at eight love you." i turn my phone off and refocus my attention to the movie.

the next morning i don't bother putting on makeup and i throw on whatever outfit was laying out. i chow down cheerios and remember the homework i was supposed to do. crap! i pull out a worksheet from my bag. okay girl you have five minutes. i quickly randomly answer questions and shove the paper into my backpack, starting to speed walk to school. "bye mom i love you." "bye jane." i look at her in disbelief. who?

i shake my head out of the trance and start walking because i know i'm gonna be late. she really did just call me jane. she's forgetting me. i knew this day would come but not this soon! i make sure i don't get sad and want to cry before walking into the school. i don't want all these fucking rumors spreading around about me. i see carl in the hallway, and smile at him. he's standing by the same girl that was in chemistry. he sees i'm looking at her and takes his arm off of her. i just roll my eyes and walk away. i know we aren't dating or anything, and i know he thinks i'm into jake but to be honest it hurts when you see the guy you think your falling for with another girl. maybe i did this to myself.

i quickly go into my home room and sit next to jake, "jake." "noah." "do you like me?" he scoffs, "um maybe." exactly what i want to hear, "wanna go out?" "aren't i supposed to ask you out?" "that would be nice but i don't like to wait." i wink and the bell rings. saved by the bell 2.0!

i walk to my first class which today was not chemistry! thank jesus himself! i sit down in english next to a girl named kris. we say our hellos then the teacher asks for our homework, i pull the scrambled piece of paper out of my bag and hand it to her, knowing that i finished this twenty minutes ago. "this looks very rushed ms. chavez." "all my thoughts were coming at once." i smile at her, liking my excuse.

i notice someone, how did i not see him before? it's derek! i immediately grab my phone out of my bra and text debbie,

oh my god guess who i just saw!

who?

your first baby daddy. derek is in my english class!

what??

i gotta put my phone away but i'll come over after school love you x

i stick my phone back into my bra and pay attention. the teacher goes on about how most of our class doesn't even know the difference between the yours and theres. which is true most of these guys are brain dead. but that's just a perk of crappy education in the south side (:

the bell rings and i gather my stuff. i already have a feeling today is going to be interesting.

i get home to see my mom passed out on the couch, i completely forgot she had a doctors appointment today! i try to shake her awake but it doesn't work. "mom?" "mommmm." "wake up."

i don't notice her moving, like at all. my mind goes to the worst. i already lost my dad there's no way somethings actually wrong with her right? i shake her harder as tears roll down my face, "mom please wake up." i press two fingers to her neck, and dial 911. she isn't breathing.

hope you guys enjoyed (:

1068 words :)