Marvel Imagines

Too Dangerous | Steve

"It's not what it looks like." Were the first words that came out of my mouth. Without even turning around, and in the darkness of my room, I knew Steve was standing behind me.

"Really?" Steve queried, surprisingly sarcastic. "Because it looks like you're planning to go on that extremely dangerous mission I asked that you don't go on." As I turned around, slipping my comm unit into my ear, I saw Steve with his arms crossed. He looked halfway between nervous and angry.

"Then I was right," I retorted, "It's not what it looks like. I'm not planning to go on that mission at all, I am going."

"You're not going."

"Well, it's a good thing you don't control me, now isn't it?" I shot back. I loved Steve- he has always been a fantastic boyfriend and I appreciate how much he cares- but he seems to occasionally forget that he doesn't control my every move.

"Well..." He faltered, as if he was about to refute the fact that that he doesn't control me. I wheeled around, raising both eyebrows at him.

"I dare you to finish that thought." I said sharply, sighing. "I'm not a baby and I don't need to be coddled, so stop it." With that, I zipped up my bag and put it over my shoulder, walking out into the hallway.

"(Y/N), I never called you a baby..." he began, following my out of the room.

"Then don't treat me like one." I interjected before he could get to the 'but'. I shrugged easily when he stared at me, not bothered by Steve's frustration with me interrupting him. If he was going to try and prove to me that I deserve to be treated like a child, I simply wouldn't let him finish.

"(Y/N), think rationally. If I'm not even going because I think it'll be a one-way ticket, what does that mean for you?" He tried again. I made a face immediately.

"It means that you think I'm not capable enough to not die." I shot back. "That, or you think you're so far above me that my skill couldn't possibly compare to yours." As soon as I looked over my shoulder, I regretted what I had said just a little bit (but not too much). Steve looked beyond hurt.

"You know that isn't what I mean, baby..." He began, but I just stormed off again, at an even more brisk pace.

"Then why don't you try saying what you mean for once, and don't leave me guessing." I said. "Not to mention, you can't go on the mission in any scenario-one-way or not- so don't try to act like you're staying behind because you want to." Steve didn't say anything for after that. It was just me walking briskly toward the landing strip for the quinjet, and Steve's heavy footsteps ringing against the emptiness of the hallway.

It wasn't until I was seconds away from boarding that he stopped me, grabbing my wrist and pulling me away.

"(Y/N), please!" He begged me. I saw his face for the first time since I left, and tears were streaming down his cheeks. "Don't go!" I sighed sadly, and I turned to give him a hug. He loosened his grip on my wrist immediately and pulled me close into him. I could hear the erratic beating of his heart in his chest.

"Are you really this afraid?" I asked quietly. I raised my head, placing my hand on his chest to feel his heart again. He didn't respond, or even nod, but he put his own hand over mine.

"Please." He repeated, sounding broken. "You can't go. It's too dangerous."  I shook my head. I had to do this, and even my insatiable want to be with the one I loved couldn't block my mind from accepting that.

"I have to." I responded, my throat tightening.

"It's too dangerous, in general. Everyone who's going... I'm worried about them, but they aren't to me what you are. Please, please reconsider, baby." He begged. His grip tightened around my fingers, and he laid his head on my shoulder. I leaned toward him, bringing him impossibly closer in one last hug.

"I know it's too dangerous, but that's exactly why I have to go. If no one takes care of it, who will? There won't be anyone to save anymore, no loved ones to come back to. And I need you here for when I get back." Steve was crying. I could feel it soaking through the collar of my shirt, but I ignored it.

"But.. What if...?" He paused, collecting his breath. "What if you don't come back for me? I need you, (Y/N)...!" Steve burst into tears, and it broke my heart to see him. He was crying harder than I'd ever seen, and all I could do was stroke his hair and feed him empty promises.

"I will come back." I said, not even knowing if that were true. But now that it's out in the open air, I have to make it come true. Otherwise...

"You can't go. You mean far too much to me!" Steve shouted into my shirt, in one last attempt to get me to stay. I closed my eyes, willing myself to hold it together for the both of us.

"Then you have to know how much it means to me that I go." I said sadly. He lifted his head, and I met his clear blue eyes with my own steady ones. "If I don't have a say in how this threat goes down- if I can't fight for you and my family and everyone else on the team- how could I take myself seriously?" He breathed out a heavy breath.

"What if I come with you?" He asked, but the offer was shaky. I squeezed his hand, sympathy overwhelming me.

"No, baby, you know you can't. You're still far too hurt to be overexerting yourself." I smoothed a hand over his shoulder, and I felt the bandages rippling the fabric of the shirt he wore.

"(Y/N)!" I turned around, and saw that it was Tony calling my name. He paused for a moment, looking between us. "It's time to go." I nodded, and he disappeared back into the jet. I turned around, and Steve immediately kissed me. It wasn't long or passionate or heated, but it told me exactly what I needed to know. 

"One for the road, I guess." He said, daring to smile slightly. "I'll be waiting when you get back." I smiled in return.

"Well then, I guess I'd better hurry up." We looked at each other for one more second before I turned and walked up the stairs. 

"I love you, (Y/N)." He said it lowly as I got to the threshold of the jet's doorway, but I heard it loud and clear.

"I love you more, Steven." I turned around and blew him a kiss. He caught it, tucking it in his front pocket, where it would be close to his heart.

And the door shut behind me.