Coffee and Flowers | Seungjin

Chapter 8 - Yellow Carnation

One last time.

Hyunjin looked back over what he wrote, tears stinging his eyes. He was hoping, maybe, by some miracle, that Seungmin would come back to him saying that he made a mistake, but in the two weeks that had passed since the incident that happened at Seungmin's house, nothing of the sort had happened. So, he decided, he had sworn to himself, that this would be the last flower. One last time.

---

Yellow carnations,
because I'm sorry I wasn't enough for you ~ H.H.

Seungmin wasn't entirely sure what to think. Had he done something to hurt them? If so, what? Questions flooded his mind, and trying to answer them was useless; they were completely unanswerable. He couldn't think anymore.

Seungmin struggled to work. He couldn't concentrate; thoughts of the message plagued his mind, gnawing away at feelings he thought he'd forgotten, like some kind of irritating rodent in his head, trying to wear its teeth down on his negative emotions. Why weren't they enough for him? What made them believe that? Seungmin's patience was wearing thin. He kept a straight face, for the sake of his work, but when he left to walk home, taking the yellow carnation with him, his fragile composure snapped, and he broke down, tears flowing from his eyes faster than the rain pouring down around him.

---

Chan and Minho knew exactly what was going on. Hyunjin had let slip to Chan that he was the "secret admirer" that Seungmin had been talking about. The two didn't want to intervene, believing that letting the two solve their issues themselves was the best approach. Clearly it was not, as Minho found out when he brought up the subject of the "admirer" one day, and Seungmin's face fell for a second, before he replaced that forlorn look with a sad smile.
"They stopped," he told him.
"What?"
"They stopped," Seungmin repeated, "They don't give me flowers anymore."
"Why?"
"I don't know," Seungmin sighed, "They're last message was just "I'm sorry I wasn't enough for you." I don't know what I did."
Minho wasn't stupid. He knew the situation with Hyunjin, and if Seungmin could coordinate however many braincells he had for one second, he would have probably worked everything out by now. But Minho knew Seungmin wasn't a particularly deep thinker.

---

"I don't know what to do," Hyunjin sobbed, tears streaming from his eyes, "I had one last chance, with those flowers, and I threw it away."
Chan was out with Minho, damn couples, so Woojin was left to console Hyunjin who had to have been crying for at least half an hour by that point.
"I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have cut it off. I'm so stupid, so fucking stupid."
"You're not stupid, Hyunjin," Woojin assured him, "We all make choices we regret. This was just one of those, okay?"
"Not okay," Hyunjin snapped back, "I want to take it all back and start again. I just want Seungmin to know that I care."
"You care?" A voice called from outside the room, "Hwang Hyunjin caring about someone, that's new."
"Shut up, Changbin," Woojin said, a hint of annoyance in his voice, "Go back to Felix, why don't you? Leave Hyunjin alone for once, please."
Changbin, weirdly, didn't argue. Hyunjin just guessed it was because he didn't want to anger Woojin. Then again, no one wanted to anger Woojin. He was usually just a big softie, but who knew what he could do when he was angry. Hyunjin wasn't sure if he wanted to know.
"Thanks," he said.
"You're welcome," The older replied, "But as I was going to say, he'll never know unless you talk to him. Just try being friends again at first. That's a start, right?"
Hyunjin breathed a heavy sigh, "Right."

---

Seungmin had arrived at work early nearly every single day for weeks. No flowers. No message. Nothing. He never expected anything, but he hoped that maybe he'd find something there someday. He felt his eyes start to sting with tears sometimes, but held them back. There's no point crying, he told himself, You don't even know who they are.

He had been working for a few hours, his mind alternating between going off on a tangent or actually concentrating, until a familiar face appeared in front of him. A very handsome familiar face, black hair messy, and slightly oversized hoodie hanging over his shoulders.

"Hey," he said, "It's... been a while."
His hands moved up to fix his hair, and Seungmin could feel his heart beating faster.
Pretty hands, Seungmin thought, Actually- scratch that- pretty boy.
He smiled sweetly in reply to the boy, "It really has."

---

A/N: Do I know what I'm doing? No.