I love summer. And now it's ending... and I'm not prepared for that. I guess I've been in denial that school was starting at all. I've postponed everything. School starts in 1.5 days. I don't have clothes, shoes, or anything for school really. I have some notebooks, some pencils, and my old backpack from school last year. So yeah. Not prepared.
I'm going into freshman year (9th grade), and I'm freaking out. School always brings back my depression and anxiety. It's worse during school/winter/colder months. I'm not sure if it's because of school or the weather, but it sucks. I wish I could stay in summer forever.
I've been doing going on vacations and mission trips and eating and watching YouTube and playing on my phone... all the things I love. But I won't get to do that as much when school starts. Those things make me happy. School...does not.
To be honest...I'm really stressed. Most of my friends feel fake. They don't know me very well. That's in part because I don't tell them everything. For example- most of my friends don't know I'm LGBT+. I don't tell them because I'm not sure how they'll react. And I know that if they don't accept me for who I am then they aren't my real friends... bla bla bla. But I still can't bring myself to say it. Also I'll have to see my crush. Every day. Which I would love...if it didn't break my heart to see her. But that's a topic for another day.
Does anyone have tips on how to survive school given my circumstances? Also I'm sorry for my shit writing. Since it's just a rant, I'm not trying too hard. In fact I'm not even gonna proofread any of this. Fuck it I guess. I'll write rants and lovesick poems in here. I'll talk about my mental health, my friends, my peers, my parents/family, and probably some other stuff. So just be prepared for a lot of trash. Okay bye.
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Feelings, rants, and more
AléatoireI need a place to get all my shit out. You don't have to read this... but it would mean a lot if you did.
