I was literally groaning typing the title. I can't believe this.
Alright, so the girl in the media section is called Blood Rachel. Oh, this is totally gonna be a well thought out character! NOT.
The appearance is not scary, at all. She already has that marked against her.
It says that she is nice, sweet, and loves to help kids. That's not what a Pasta is supposed to be. Stories should be scary, and characters shouldn't be motherly, especially with a name like Blood Rachel.
"Rachel was a girl who was homeschooled. She never got to meet her mother, but she heard she left her father because she liked someone else."
Ok, not too bad.
"Ever since her parents divorce, her dad had been drinking and threatening to kill people."
Whoop, there it is.
"Her little sister Ranika got bad influences from him. When going to school, she would get picked on by many people, but she couldn't tell anyone."
Ah, the old bullying cliché. I haven't seen those in almost every Creepypasta Mary Sue in existence.
"One day, Rachel came to a voodoo shop. When she went in she saw a handsome looking man there. He told her that he would give anything to her, any wish, but only for a price. The price was that Rachel had to give up her human soul. Rachel saw his attractivness and she decided to agree. But it was all a trick."
Ok, why was she in a voodoo shop and why did she sell her soul? Just because he was attractive? That's bull.
"Her skin became pale and lifeless, her hair became messy, her eyes were not green no more, they were gray. She hated how she looked. The man kissed her and ran away. Rachel then started running home crying. When she got home, she saw Ranika getting slapped by her dad."
Ooooh, the big appearance change after making a terrible mistake. Not surprising. And the abuse.
"Rachel then killed her dad by using a knife."
Why does everyone want to kill their parents all of a sudden?
"Rachel ran to the bathroom and started cutting her hair and putting it over her eyes. She then grabbed Rae Rae and ran to the woods. Ranika found another girl. She wad pale too. She then decided to take care of Ranika and the girl. The girls name was Lucy. Rachel loved Lucy, she was beautiful, smart, and funny. She also had an abusive family who she killed. Rachel decided that she would do anything for her. Then Rae Rae got lost. Rachel was so scared and tried looking for her. She found a mansion. The mansion is abandoned, with Rachel not having a home now, especially for the kids, she decided to live there to start fresh."
So you ran away with the law possibly on your tail with your little sister and started living with a complete stranger who killed people and you live the rest of your life happily ever after? That's just sappy and not the point of an OC.
It also says she hates Ben and Jeff, who weren't mentioned anywhere, loves kittens but not cats (that's fine), and has a sassy sister (alright, then).
She gets along with Rogue because of similar goals and motherly behavior. WHO IS THIS ROGUE GIRL?!?! We haven't seen or heard of Rogue anywhere. Where did she come from?
And she's also 31 and dating someone. The age was unexpected, but whatever. The shipping's OK also, as long as the creator of the other character is fine with it.
So, Rachel is a crappy character. That's all I have to say. I hope you enjoyed another chapter of "WHAT HAS THIS WORLD COME TO?" with Alice.
