The Beginning Of My End.

Chapter 9

Val's POV.

      I woke up this morning in the hospital, it's been 4 days since Zoella's death. I'm still a little bit shocked about the whole thing.

I didn't know her that much to be so sad about her death but that doesn't mean that I'm not ! I just don't know how to react right now, she died alone, sad and heartbroken. that's terrible.

I don't want to die alone...

I mean I don't really know what happened to her to make her be in here alone with none but i think i'm going to find out soon.

      I was in deep thoughts when i heard a knock on my door "come in" I said, the door open and my mum came in"hey Val, how are you feeling ?"she said walking toward me and sitting on the edge of my bed "hey mum, better...I think I'm feeling better"I said smiling weakly at her.

"good,...Ummm did you do this to yourself?" she suddenly asked randomly looking at my wrists.

I guess she was trying to ask me this for the past 4 days but i think she couldn't, so she just slip it out today.

I stayed in silence for a few minutes but I finally spoke when I saw her feeling uncomfortable. '' ..  '' I was just going to say yes I did and honestly I'm not afraid to say that I did this to myself. but she suddenly said '' why? '' she was giving the '' I BEG YOU'' look.  mum please not that look urggg.  '' I.. listen, I don't want to talk about it please '' ''look, it just ended and you know, all teenagers have some problems but they get through it. it isn't that hard.  it was just a bad time and I'm gonna be fine.. I'm not saying that I don't want to tell you but I just want to keep it for myself please.  I'm fine now,  no need to worry'' i took a deep breath after that forever speech.. wow that was too long. I was shocked that she didn't say a word. she just smiled and tapped my back and left. well, that was pretty awkward. did I say something wrong or did I just say theright thing? I just didn't want to talk about it. I was really avoiding a speech, I mean I'm not ready for this.

hours later...

" I packed your stuff cause they said that you can leave now... they were just doing some tests and stuff'' my mum said focusing on her mobile screen.

" I've to go to work today" I just remembered ughh.. who needs to be at a bar right now dealing with bunch of drunks freaking people.

'' do you have to go?.. i mean are you feeling alright? ''

''mum, yes I'm good and I've to go to work'' I said a bit annoyed.. she keeps asking questions and I'm just not ready to answer.. I know I was overreacting.

my mum stepped out so I can dress up. I took a pair of jeans and a random t-shirt, washed my face, brushed my teeth and I'm ready to go.. it was nearly 7pm.

           half an hour later I was in the front of the club or the bar or whatever it is doors. I just took a deep breath and stepped in.. the song i heard the moment I entered was so familiar.. I swear I heard it somewhere.  '' VALENTINAAA'' you gotta be kidding me.. Ellie.. they told me that she left the job.. I turned around to face her. and I was shocked.. oh my god look at that freaking turquoise hair.. oh my god '' are you shitting me? '' ..

" what?  it was time to have a new look" she smirked..

''you look cool by the way"

"and you look pathetic yourself'' she said smiling back like it was an amazing compliment.

" please, let's not talk about that"I told her in a threaten tone..

'' look who was having a good time at Aiden's, that's why you look bloody tired, aww i think i missed the good things here'' what the hell she just said? who is Aiden anyway.. I totally forgot about him. it's been long time, well, let's face it, I didn't forget about him totally but well, why the heck she is talking about him right now.. Ellie i missed you but really you're a bitch sweety.. ugh