Peter Parker Swings Out of the Closet

5: Treatment and Gifts

TW: Mentions of suicide attempts, self harm. Look for italicized bolded words.
(Peter's POV)
"It's been three weeks, why can't I wear my binder?" I whine to Bruce, just like every other day I've been stuck here. 

"Because your broken ribs still aren't fully healed! Give it another week, kid. You've made so much progress and once you go back to school, you'll get to wear a binder." Bruce explains for the fifth time today.

"Ugh, fine." I stomp away, making sure to slam my door loudly when I reach my room. 

It's been three weeks since Nat found me on the bathroom floor, and three weeks since Tony found out I'm trans. We don't talk about it much, but when I'm having a bad dysphoria day he leaves me alone, except for when it's therapy time. I have therapy almost every day and every time I go I don't say anything. How can I? My "therapist" is Bruce, and he's like family to me, and it's just too awkward to tell him anything personal. We usually just play cards or he does my weekly check up, which consists of me getting my blood taken, being weighed, and he checks my skin for any new scars or cuts before giving me my testosterone shot. 

My thoughts are interrupted when I here JARVIS say "Mr. Parker, you are requested by Dr. Banner in his lab." 

"JARVIS, tell Dr.Banner that I'm not coming."

A few minuets later Tony opens my door and sits on the edge of my bed. "Peter, I don't care if you don't want to talk to Bruce, but you need to talk to someone. Please, kid , all we want is to help you."
"Mr. Stark, I'm fine." I snap at him. 

"Oh yeah, sure kid. If you were fine, you wouldn't have almost died a few weeks ago and you wouldn't be crying yourself to sleep every night." 

I'm shocked that Tony knows about that.
"Mr.Stark, how do you-?"

"JARVIS gives me a daily report and I watch the footage from your room every night. Peter, please talk to us." Tony says sadly.

I feel guilty about making him worry, so I decide that maybe I should talk to him.
"okay."

Tony looks up, shocked. "Okay?" He asks.

"I'll talk to you." I say quietly.

"That's great kid, just start whenever you're ready. Maybe start with how this all started?"
It's silent for a minute or two while I think about where to start. I take a deep breath and dive right in.

"Okay. So, I came out as trans after attempting suicide on my 14th birthday, just over two years and two months ago. Before that I had been binding with ace bandages and duct tape, and I would go days without eating. After my uh... attempt, Aunt May started saving money and I got a binder and pretty soon after I started Testosterone. 

Both of those helped a lot, but I was constantly anxious and sometimes it would get to the point where I had lost all control and wasn't myself. I started cutting as a way to bring myself down to earth and give myself control over something in my life. I don't do it often because usually I'm able to call someone before it gets too bad. 

Three weeks ago, I wasn't really trying to kill my self, just trying to get some control. But I wouldn't have minded if I had died. I guess I just... don't really see the point in living. I'm a prisoner in my own body and some days are better than others, but every day sucks and what's the point of living a life if you're not happy? I'm just so, so tired of living this way."

Once I start talking I can't stop, and everything just come out of me. I don't even realize I'm crying until Mr.Stark hugs me and I get snot all over his shirt. We stay like that, holding each other for a while and eventually I fall asleep.

(Tony's POV)

Peter falls asleep in my arms and I don't want to wake him, so I just lay there for a while, thinking about everything he told me. I'm happy he trusts me enough to tell me all that, but when I said he could talk to me I was not expecting all that.

 After I make a plan of how to help Peter, I slowly detach myself from Peter and go down to my lab. I've been working for a few hours, doing research, making calls and signing paperwork, finishing Peter's (very) late gift when I hear Peter say,"I'm sorry Mr.Stark, I didn't mean to tell you all that." He's looking at his feet and avoiding eye contact.

"Hey, kid, how'd you sleep?" I ask, ignoring his comment at first.

"I slept good..." he says, sounding confused. 

"That's great. And, hey, we agreed on no more calling me 'Mr. Stark' or 'Sir', right?"
Peter chuckles and nods, still seeming uneasy.

"Alright kid come sit down." He looks at me, almost as if he's scared, before sitting on the edge of my workstation.

"If you ever start losing control again, you call me. I don't care how busy I am, I will come to you and I will help you." 

I move aside and show him what I've been working on. It's a bracelet with a button in the center.
"This is a distress button. You press it, I come. Oh, and another thing... you mentioned that your birthday recently passed but I didn't know you then and I didn't get you a gift so if you'll open that box there..." I say, pointing at a poorly wrapped box. I watch his face as he carefully opens it and finds a note.

"Congratulations Peter, December 12" he reads from the note and looks at me confused. 

"Keep going, there's something in the box."

His face lights up with joy as he holds up the binder I made him a while ago, but never gave to him because he was still very hurt.

"But, after December 12th, you won't be needing that." 

He stares at me for a second, and then realization hits him, and he instantly grabs me into a hug, shouting his thanks. I grin as he runs around the room. 

"I've already confirmed it with Aunt May, but you need to go get examined by Bruce sometime this week so he can work with the top surgeon." 

"Thank you thank you thank you, Mr.- ah, Tony! I can't wait to go tell Ned and MJ!"
"Well go on then!" I say with a laugh, glad that I finally did something right.

A/N: Peter is getting Top Surgery! Dad!Tony decided that the kid deserved some happiness and so he pulled a few strings to make it work. Things are starting to look up for Peter! Anyways, hope you like the story.