THE SPECTACLE EMANATION OF GHOST CHILDREN

THE SPECTACLE EMANATION OF GHOST CHILDREN Part 12

Shemeka Finds Her Father

"Shemeka I found your dad he lives in this neighborhood," Steve cried.

Now how could I have already known that? In one casual glance at this neighborhood, I knew this is the kind of place my dad would move into. Perhaps I need to calm down a little, I'm so excited; the intensity of seeing my dad when I thought that I would never see him again is heart-stopping, actually, death can be a mental immoral commitment for the ones who are left behind. That is why I needed to let him know; that I am alright and that I stayed behind for him.

We all floated in the house at one time, my dad has another family with three kids and while they were all sitting down for dinner, I could not help but wonder who I am to them. I looked at Steve and I could tell he was concerned about my feelings so I let him in on them.

"I wonder did my dad remarry into an already made family or are these kids, my sisters and brother?"

"We can always find out just by asking her."

"Steve, what are you talking about? Who can we ask?"

"The little girl, can't you see her? She is looking right at us."

"She can see all of us?" Narnia cheered.

"Yes, can't you tell?" Narnia burst into laughter.

"So she can," I said in a serene voice.

Looking into the little girls' eyes, I can tell she was apart of me, she is my little sister. So I started by waving at her and she waved back at us.

"Hi I'm Shemeka I'm your big sister."

"Honey, who are you waving at?" The little girl's mother asked.

"I don't know, but one of them said her name is Shemeka and she said she is my big sister."

In fear, my dad looked up towards the place where Little Debbie was looking.

"Yeah right Debbie, stop playing at the dinner table and eat your food." Debbie's older sister said; who looked my age when I died. So I really can't tell if he married into an already made family or not, but his new wife did give my father a daughter who looks just like me when I was Debbie's age. All of a sudden my dad started choking at the table.

"Larry dear, are you alright? What's the matter? You look as if you seen a ghost."

My father began to get starry-eyed he gazes into a distance, as though he was looking straight through and beyond my stepmother's face, wanting to say something but couldn't. He looked at my sister and asked her to repeat what she just said.

"Debbie, Debbie honey, what, what did you say?" My father said as he got up from his chair and kneels down in front of her in fear.

"One of the ghosts said that I was her little sister and her name was Shemeka." Little Debbie repeated.

It's been over twenty years and the kids never knew about my dad's short life with his other family, he only told their mother and she never told anyone, so naturally, my dad became petrified when Debbie mentions my name. My father stood up shaking in his knees; and under the circumstances, I can understand his point of view, but because of his fear of me, I felt a heap of bitterness down in my spiritual soul and my heart dripped with tears if only I could reach out to him. Steve watched us both me and my dad, and he could not stand it anymore.

"Come on Shemeka, we can't stay here any longer, he is too afraid of you."

"Come on you guys help me reach my dad."

"Shemeka," Steve replied. "My parents would not accept me either; they felt that I was haunting them when all I wanted to do is let them know I was alright."

"No, my father is not like that, can't you see he is just hurt?"

"No," Narnia cried, "He is rigid with fear. We can't stay here; your self-pity is trying to keep him from moving on."

"Perhaps, maybe you are right," I cried.

"Shemeka, you know she is right, let's just go!"

As little Debbie watched and listen to my friends talk me into leaving and that's when she called out to Dad.

"Daddy, Shemeka was my sister?"

A state of fear came over my father and his eyes rolled back of his head as he passed out, I knew then I would never be able to reach my dad; to tell him that I loved him and that I miss him.

"Come on Shemeka lets go."

"Wait, you guys, let me say something to my sister," I said while my friends waited outside floating in the wind.

"Debbie will you please tell daddy that I love him and I'm going to be just fine," I said to my sister as she looked at me and nodded yeah. My father's new family all gather around him while he laid passed out on the floor, little Debbie never took her eyes off of me; therefore I could not leave until I saw that my family was alright. Looking out the window at my friends knowing they were getting impatient to leave, still, I knew I needed to stay. But how do I tell them I can't leave right now?

"Steve you and the others go ahead I'm going to stick around just to see what life would have been like if I had lived."

"Shemeka, you need to leave now, can't you see what you are doing to your family?"

"I promise Steve, I won't let anyone see me, I'll be very discreet." Steve nodded and gathered the others and left.

The very thought of knowing that I have sisters and a brother and would have had a large family if only I had lived.

My father was the kind of person who loved his own much better than himself. So I know these kids have a very good life, I only wished I could have been a part of that, because he thought that love is good and with that kind of love where one share with one another; not just love but everything which make everything is out on the table and nothing is kept secret. So why didn't he tell my sisters and brother about me?

I wished I had gone through the light, then I would never have seen that my father moved on without me and my mom and I know I didn't want my dad to suffer so why does this hurt so bad?

Being a ghost has some advantages but not being able to love and touch the one you love can also be overwhelming, the pain can really hurt no wonder when people die; they just leave those they left behind.

Stricken with agony and afflicted with pain in my heart, as my little sister watched us until she thought we were out of sight. From disillusionment to shame I placed my friends in an awful position and because of it, we all lacked a positive spirit on this gloomy day. A day that has been a challenge for all of us, still I could not be happier for such wonderful friends, which led me to let them go while I fade out of sight to watch my family; I needed to get to know them.