Memory.

Part Five.

"So..." I looked around. We were the only ones left in the parking lot. It was like we were too lost in each other to notice anyone around us leaving.

"So." Harry sighed in agreement. All the sudden a wicked grin came across his face. He turned around briskly and dug in the backseat of his Range Rover- the same as my mother's. all the sudden he turned around with a bottle of alchohol and two red plastic cups. "Here's to starting over?"

"Um... do I drink?" I laughed.

"Like there's no tomorrow, babe." He smiled. Something about how he said the word babe made me feel so... alive.

"Okay, cheers!" I smiled and took one of the cups that he filled up.

"I still can't believe that...." Harry's voice slowly trailed off. He shook his head like he was in disbelief of something, but he never finished.

"What?"

"I just can't believe that you lost your memory completely. You have no idea who the hell I am." He half laughed as the red cup made contact with his full lips.

"Should I?" I questioned, looking deep into his vibrant eyes.

"Yes, we have a past... but, it's new beginnings, right?"

I nodded slowly, but inside I got a knot and a unsettling feeling in my stomach. Maybe this is good, a new beginning. But then what if I need to know about the past. What if there is something I did, or someone else did- that could change everything?

This thought made me question Harry even more. So, I said, "Harry, I have a question... You seem awfully happy to 'start over' with me, and apparently we have a past... so what exactly happened in that past?"

I braced myself for his answer. What if we aren't even friends- what if we hate each other?? I don't want to hate Harry. I really really don't. But that would explain why he was so shocked that I wanted him to sit with me, and he had no idea I didn't even remember him.

What if I find out about someone that I knew, but don't remember now, and I have to choose between the feelings I should have and the feelings that I have now? Why does this have to be so damn complicated?!

Harry still stood stiffly, like he was thinking of something to say. "We um... we used to be together. You broke up with me 2 months ago." His body was still and I could practically see the tension inside him.

"Why?" I asked.

He paused and stared off into the distance. He was so hard to read sometimes, and then I could read him like an open book. And it was confusing the hell out of me. But at the moment, I didn't know what was going on inside that mind of his.

After a long moment of silence, he said, "You never really gave me a good reason...."

I shrugged. "Oh, well... I'm sorry. I guess I was an idiot." I gave him a grin.

"No you weren't. You were, and still are, amazing and as beautiful as always." His emerald eyes stared passionately into mine.

We were lost in each other's eyes, alone in the school parking lot... illegally drinking. I felt the butterflies come back and my eyes fluttered away from his nervously.

"Well." I broke the passion and silence between us. "I should probably get home."

Harry nodded in agreement. "Amber, this may sound stupid but... Do you remember where your house is? I'm just making sure you get home safe."

I giggled and said, "I have it programmed into my GPS, I'm good." I smiled.

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow." He smiled.

"Sounds good, see you later." I walked away slowly from his presence and to my Kia. The drive home was short, shorter than I anticipated. The drive to school seemed so much longer.

I walked in the front door and dropped my bag on the floor. All the sudden tiny footsteps came running down the spiral stairs.

My little brother came lunging towards me and into my arms. "Amber!" He smiled from ear to ear.

He was just 4, and such a cutie pie. He had blond hair and hazel eyes- just like my mom. I guess I take after my dad, because I have brown hair and blue eyes.

Which reminds me, I need to ask my mom about my dad. I want to see a picture, or something. Everyone I mention him she has to go somewhere or she shuts the topic of his down altogether. Connor and Bria don't say much, I don't even think they know.

"How was your day, Connor? Did you have a good day at school?" I knelt down to his level. He was a short kid.

"Mhm! I made you this." His little hand extended and he handed me a paper. He had drawn me a picture.

I observed it closely and saw an oval-squarish shape with two sticks with circles on top inside it. There were two circles on the bottom of the mystery shape as well. I had no idea what it was, but his face was too priceless to risk offending. I said, "Wow! It's so pretty, Connor!"

Thankfully, without me having to ask he explained the illustration. "That's me.." he pointed to the stick with the circle on top, obviously now a head and body, "and that's you. We are in a car. This is us before the accident- when you were normal."

I held my breath at what he said. When I was normal? Apparently to my little brother I am no longer normal, which is not far from reality, but still. "Thank you for my drawing. I'll go hang it in my bedroom now." I patted his head and walked away.

As soon as I got up to my bedroom I closed the door and rested my back against it. Slowly I slid down to the ground. "When I was normal." I repeated Connor's words.

They stayed in my mind for the rest of the evening. At the dinner table.... 'When I was normal.' In the living room.... 'When I was nornal.' And the worst time, when I went to bed and the silence of the night let my thoughts dominate me.