Shadows

32.

I pulled my legs up and formed my arms around them. I was sitting in my window seat and staring outside. Me, sitting here gave me flashback form when Blake lied.

It has been 3 days. Brendon and Julian both looked for them everywhere, everywhere in the town, every little town around even the big cities in the neighborhood. He's nowhere. He's also not picking up his phone or answering his texts.

An me? I'm doing so well. I think that if I said more than 3 whole sentences these days it's a lot. of course i told Mike, Alison, Sophie and Bella what's up. They have been here for me which I appreciate a lot.

Every time I was alone or had nothing to do I made up these sceneries. I my head he has already been killed and eaten by the wolves. of course that's not true, so I'm reckless. Brendon and Julian told me he's probably just needed a little time for himself. But why now? Why after that night> of all the night he could have gone away, why then?

His dad isn't that worried about him. I haven't really spoken to him after Saturday but Brendon told me he's pretty casual under the circumstances.

I wipe away the lonely tear that fell down my face. I've cried a lot these last days. Mostly because I'm just afraid Blake doesn't like me anymore, and he just left me like every other girl. I'm so fucking afraid it's just unrequited love.

I jumped at the three knock that landed on my door.

'Chrissy?' I heard my sister open the door

'hey' I smiled weakly at her

'there's someone here for you' she just said and then left. I turned completely so that my legs hung down from the window seat.

'hey Chrissy' Brendon and Julian came in.

'did you find him?' I asked right away

'in a town, a few hours away sitting on a bench talking to an old man' Brendon spurted out

I frowned 'we have questions too' Julian said.

'but' Brendon sighed 'he said he first wanted to talk to you'

'is he here?' I asked and they both nodded.

They both stepped aside which made Blake appear in my sight. He was looking at the ground. His clothes where dirty and his hair was a mess, he definitely hasn't been taking care of himself.

I wanted to run at him, fall in his arms and kiss the living day light out of him. but I didn't. under all the hurt I'm also mad, he knew this was special to me and still he left and didn't even said he was fine.

'we'll leave you two alone' Julian stumbled as they both walked out of my room and closed the door behind them.

'where the fuck have you been' I snapped

'I'm sorry' he looked up.

'you should be. Do you even know how worried I was?' I looked up at him

'yeah, I listened to all your voicemail's he looked up

'and you did nothing. just listen to them, you didn't even texted me to say that you were fine. Not dead' I was pretty mad

'I'm sorry' he whispered, looking at the ground again.

'why did you go away?' I asked after a while 'did you not think it was special? Because I thought it was, and it hurt a lot knowing you just went away'

'I went away because I was scared' he looked up

'scared?'

'yes scared. scared of my feelings, scared of the things we did, scared of you, scared of the things you made me feel' he rambled

'scared of me?' I looked down

'do you know what you do to me Christina?' he almost yelled 'you make me feel this feeling that I don't understand. I have never felt anything before and I don't know if I like it. it's like that feeling when you drink coffee after being in the cold weather, but then all the time. It's almost like a belly age only it doesn't hurt. and the weird thing is, I only get it when I see you. it's gets stronger every time you kiss me. and that night, when we had sex, the feeling overwhelmed me. I didn't know what happened to me, I got scared and ran'

I looked down and was biting my lips. He just described exactly how I feel.

'I started driving for hours until I found myself in this small town. I spend 2 days just trying to figure out what to do and what I felt. This morning I sat on a bench in front of a fountain. I had my head in my hands and because this worried an old man he sat next to me. I don't know why but I told him everything.'

'Blake where is this going?' I asked him

'I think-' he stopped and let out a sharp breath before looking me in the eye.

'what?' I said breathlessly

'I love you' he told me

'I love you too' I smiled small

'no you don't understand' he shook mis head 'I've never said that to anyone before. Not even to my mom, or dad, or my friends.'

'is that what you didn't get?' I asked as I stood up

'yes, I blamed it on the fact that you're hot and I just got horny but that wasn't. I'm madly in love with you and if I should believe that old man I should never let you go'

'please believe that old man' I smiled

'oh I believe him' he smiled.

I then walked to him, formed my arms around him and pulled him as close to me as I could,.

'please don't ever, ever, ever pull that stunt on me again' I whispered to him.

He then formed his arms around me and pressed my body against his.

He was hugging me.

He is hugging me!

HE'S FUCKING HUGGING ME.

'you're a special one Christina' he mumbled

'I love you Blake Bloomingdale' I moved back to look at him

'I love you more' he smiled and then pressed his perfectly shaped lips against mine.