Eugh.
Jesus made me go see Dad with him today. It was lame as usual. I don't think I talked even once. Dad had a black eye which neither of us said anything about, they were too busy talking about some speech competition Jesus is representing the school for anyway because he's amazing and all that. You are supposed to be 18 to do it but Jesus is a god so they let him in.
I got two less wolf whistles than I usually do which means my 'boy repellent' pants are working so that's a plus. Each time I go there I usually try out a new fashion to see which one will get me the least unwanted attention because most the guys there are generally creeps. My new test was these old orange three quarter pants. In other words they are fashion suicide. Someone even yelled at me on the way home - "NICE HIGH-VIS LESBO"
I think they were referencing those orange high visibility clothes road works people wear. And lesbians. So I think we can agree these pants do the job.
Speaking of pants Sly gave me $400 for clothes???!!!! I was like
-"What are you expecting me to buy? A suit made of poor people's tears?"
Sly said – "No something formal but not to formal. And please make sure you're on time I have a lot of people to talk too."
I'm not very good at fashion so this is going to be hard. He also said he couldn't come shopping with me because he's going to Christchurch for a few days. I've never been trusted with this kind of thing Phillip. What's formal but not to formal?! WHAT'S FORMAL BUT NOT TO FORMAL?! I'M PANICKING.
You – "Maybe a nice dress?"
Nah. I'll get a fancy top or something. Dresses are scary, you have to sit with your legs crossed.
YOU ARE READING
Phillip
HumorA famous activist becomes obsessed with an asexual girl. Hello Phillip I guess we've come to the end of this journey. Get it? Journey? Because you're a journal. Hah. Reading back I've just realised that you and I have been through a lot...
