Wrong Time

Chapter 36: Start Over

·Archer's POV·

This is a really weird feeling, having to choose for my own. Never have I been asked what I wanted. I always did what other people told me to do.

I used to go to pointless business balls, where the rival companies would kiss my father's ass.

I would go to my mum's friends' tea parties. There, they liked to play matchmakers, trying to set me up with every single one of their daughters.

I went to St. George because my parents enrolled me in there.

I haven't realized that I was caged until now. I've never been free to think about how I want my life to look like. And now I have a choice.
I won't lie, both options are quite tempting.

On the one hand, we have the come-back-to-life-again option. How many times have I wished to be able to change the past, so I wouldn't have been murdered. That way I would be living the perfect life as a happy husband, father and boss. What I'll always be angry about is not having been able to witness Noah grow old and become the man he is today. My little brother, tormented by our last night together. And then, there's Grace, my Grace. Too damn stubborn to open up her mind and try to put herself in my shoes. Right now I know she must be overthinking every detail of yesterday's events, including her actions. I also know her well enough to affirm she wants to apologize for her behavior by now. Grace isn't that kind of hot-headed girl, that I can assure you. It's understandable though. She had just told me that she loves me and after an hour or so, I was contemplating the idea of leaving her after all the times I've begged her not to give up on us. Now it's me who is giving up on not just her, but on everything I have and love. This leads me to my second opinion: leaving the Earth and joining the other angels.

Who would have thought, huh? That Archer Gray Sutcliffe, the ultimate bad boy and trouble maker, would be chosen to play a part in heaven's day to day life.

It's all I could ask for. Although I love the idea of getting my body back and start my life again as a normal teenager, a voice deep inside of me makes me doubt myself. Maybe it isn't for me anymore, being alive. I once told Grace that I believe in destiny, that what it's meant to be always finds its way. As much as Ella tells me that being murdered at seventeen wasn't part of the plan, I feel like it was my destiny. I was supposed to die, wander the Earth for some years, help Grace fight the darkness and finally go to heaven. Just think about it from my perspective. If I choose to become a guardian angel, I will be able to look after everyone I care about from above, more powerful than ever I've been before. My family, my old friends and Grace will be safe all thanks to me. And, who knows? Maybe I can help children or teenagers who are or will be in dangerous situations, like I was back in the day. How many lives will I be capable of saving that way? The answer is: more lives than you'll safe being alive again.

As you can see, I wasn't raised to act like an egotistical man. Everything I do, I do it for the ones I love the most. It's hard for me to be selfish for once.

After some hours of introspection, I decide to go and wander the town a bit. Maybe that's what I need to clear my head of thoughts about yesterday's messy incident. I let my feet take me to wherever they want. When I stop, a huge, familiar mansion stands before my eyes.

My home.

I enter the place and what I see shocks me. In the garden, I recognise my parents and my brother around the table, eating lunch together. Then my eyes focus on the woman sitting next to him, taking his hand in hers while talking to my mother. A child's shriek of joy caught my attention. Noah's children were playing around an old tree and I saw him. His son, Archer. I can't help but think that we both do look so alike. Dark brown hair contrasting our light brown eyes and lean figure. Looking at the scene in a bigger picture, I realized something.

I missed all of that.

I missed my brother's wedding.

I missed my niece's and nephew's births.

I missed all of their birthdays and every celebration for the past forty years.

That's when it all starts to clear up. My heart wants me to choose an option, whereas my brain wants me to choose the other one. The need to protect their pure souls is way more important than to follow my brain's desires. I'm a passionate guy, why should I change now?

My decision is made. They need my help in their lives and I'll be there for my beloved ones every step of the way.

It may not be the wisest option in the long run and I might regret it. However, as Grace answered me yesterday, it's not about me anymore. They need me, as much as I need them. I'm starting over as a new man from now on.

There's no turning back now.

                               *****

A.N: Hello guys! Here's another Archer's POV, to show you what he was thinking and doing before he decided what to do. What will he choose? Read next chapter to find out!
Love,
M³