AKRASIA // ZUCKLES [2]

FOUR

fact; i was born upside down, back to front and with my umbilical cord wrapped around my neck. i was also born not breathing but thankfully they were able to help me:))

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Jay had managed to walk us back to the boys from where we were sat, Cam had met us at the front door to the building and he could tell there was something up with me.

"Jay can you go back in? I'm just gonna have a word with Eli" Cam said as he sat us down on the sofas in the side room. Jay nodded before wondering out of the doot leaving me alone with Cam. "What happened?"

"I broke, Cam. I think Mason pushed me over the edge finally" I say as he gives a confused look.

"What do you mean he pushed you over the edge?" He questions as I sigh.

"My mind played a trick on me. In my mind I kissed Jay, rather passionately and it scared me" I say as he sighs.

"Oh Eli" He says before wrapping his arms around my shoulders.

"I know Cam, I think I'm insane and I don't know what to do" I say as he removes his arms from me. "I know its fucked Cam, you can't tell anyone"

"I promise I won't" Cam says. "But you need to tell me what happened in England Eli"

"Nothing happened Cam" I state before huffing at him.

"What happened with the baby El?" Cam says as I freze in place.

"I went into birth a week early, I obviously started to panic as I was scared that she was coming early and I freaked out to Sami as she was with me at the time. Craig and my family met us at the hospital where I was going to give birth to my beautiful girl. I was prepped and ready in my hospital room ready to have her and that's when the doctor started freaking out, she told me to push so I did. She was upside down and backwards, the umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck" I say as tears started streaming down my face. "It all happened so fast, she came out and there was no crying what so ever, they took her and it all went wrong"

Cam had pulled me towards him and placed my head on his lap as I cried onto his jeans. I was a wreck and I wasn't sure if I'd ever be okay, I took a few breathd before continuing.

"They came back to me a few minutes later and told me she'd died, a part of me died in that moment" I say as Cam uses his hand to stroke my hair.

"I don't plan on leaving ever, I'm here for you and I always will be" Cam says as I sigh. I wish it was someone else saying it to me instead of Cam.