Spoken Word and Songs (2013-2018)

I Was Bad Again Today

Depressiety

I was bad again today..

I was bad again today..

But I can't bring myself to say..

To say to you, that I was bad again today..

I don't want to feel like a burden,

But it feels like the burden is on my shoulders.

I was bad again today..

But I can't bring myself to say..

To say to you how much I need your comfort.

To ask you for help and ease my state of mind.

I was bad again today..

But I can't bring myself to say..

How much I cry in the middle of the night,

How much my tears stain the pillows as I am alone.

I was bad again today..

But I can't bring myself to say..

How much I need your love and compassion as I drench in my own blood

As I sit on the egde of the bed, watching the blade cascade across my skin.

I was bad again today..

But I can't bring myself to say..

How much I hate my every being.

How much I hate the words and the thoughts I think.

I was bad again today..

But I can't bring myself to say..

That I am tired.. My eyes are sunken in, and my eyelids can never seem to fall.

I am stuck in a restless sleep ridden dream.

I was bad again today..

But I can't bring myself to say..

How much I am dying inside.

I swear I haven't lied to you.. It just feels like I have been denied your presence.

Even though it was me that pushed you aside.

I was bad again today..

But I can't bring myself to say..

How much my feelings collide..

Its not a joyride.

My eyes are weary from the lack of sleep.

I am divided in my thoughts.

And I have cried myself awake.. Because sleep illudes me.

I was bad again today..

But I can't bring myself to say..

To say that I am not sober..

Over ...over, Mayday.. Mayday..

I don't feel like the owner of my own thoughts.

I was bad again today..

But I can't bring myself to say..

I am sorry Mom..And Im sorry Dad, But I can't find the strength to get up today..

I just want to runaway from it all.

But I can't..

I was bad again today..

But I... Can't bear the weight of my own.. mistakes...