Call Me: Lady X ✔

17: Confession-Time

While the rest of the class did warm-up exercises- making strange faces as their lips stretched into impossible shapes, and groaning, along with other weird sounds- I talked to Claire and Alana in the back of the room. Shane, Marco and Braden were

‘pardoned’ from class, as Claire explained. Since Marco didn’t have to come, that let Shane right off the hook. “I just told Braden don’t even bother.” Alana had said. But our conversations were far past their boyfriends, it was my ex-boyfriend we were talking about.

I’d told them about the success of the plan, and they were excited. Alana wanted to see the messages, but I kept them private. When they finally seemed to grasp my mood on the whole thing- not very enthusiastic- Claire finally asked, “What’s wrong, Soph? Did something happen, did he find out?” It was a stupid question to ask, and Alana answered it for her, “Come on, Claire, the ‘Plan’ wouldn’t have succeeded if he found out.”

All three of our eyes rolled. “Back to my original question”- she shot a dirty glare at Alana, and then flickered her eyes back to me- “ What on earth is wrong, Sophia? It worked, obviously.”- Another dirty glare- “Wasn’t that your goal, make Shane develop feelings for…what’s- her-name.”

I grew defensive for my creation. “ Xaviera. Say the letters XAV to yourself, and then add era.” While I may be upset about Shane, Xaviera had done nothing wrong. She was part of me, it seemed. She’d brought out many personality traits I didn’t know I had. It was shocking, though, all this time, I thought I’d simply been playing a character, acting, I’d really been being myself. I could easily have come up with several witty comments to some of Alana’s earlier statements. I could easily have stayed home from voice acting class- though my obedience was a more dominant trait, and I would have felt insanely guilty ( plus, I didn’t want the time I’d been on my Mother’s good side to be totally minute)- because Xaviera was fearless. Though I keep my conscience almost clean (lying to Shane and my Mother about what’s really happening Facebook) , and don’t have any plans of mucking it up in the near future, I wouldn’t be a coward anymore.

Confidence surged through me. I stood up, knocking the flimsy metal chair over in the process.

“ Sweet baby Jesus.” Claire whispered. Alana’s eyes were wide. She grabbed her shoplifted purse from the floor beside her, as if there was an emergency and we’d need to go.

“ What the hell, Sophia?” She whispered, acid on her tongue. Alana hated being embarrassed.

“ I have to get out of here.” I answered her, and the teacher, whose eyes had blazed with that unspoken question, too, pointed her finger to the door.

There were things I needed to do. Things I needed to get off my chest. Things I hadn’t even realized needed to be said until I embraced…my true self. Who was kind of like an intertwining of Xaviera and Sophia…

As I ran down the tiled hall, I heard eager footsteps behind me. I stopped suddenly, waiting for them to reach me, it’s not like I had to turn around to see who it was. To my best friends, I had things I needed to say.

When they reached me, I put an index finger to my lips, hushing them, silencing what I knew would have been feisty interrogation.

“ I have things I need to say to the both of you.”

They waited, almost falling over with curiosity and paranoia. I couldn’t imagine how my face looked.

I started with Claire, “ Claire, I love you, but you need someone to tell you that your relationship is headed for a bad turn. Marco is going to keep pressuring you to have sex, admit it, he is, isn’t he? Keep your purity, your religion seems really important. More than a boy, don’t you think? He won’t respect it, Claire, you know that.”