My Brother's Best Friend

Chapter 20

I looked up to him quickly "oh you had my attention the moment I saw you on the couch. I couldn't touch you without my mind flicking back to that kiss."

Jax laughed "I had always thought of that kiss, everything about you was always on my mind. The way you would sway your hips, your sweet laughter as Bobby would tell a lame joke or how you were never too far away from us boys."

I giggled "Bobby's friends were always nicer than mine. I thought about you a bit. I lied when I said I didn't even know you had left. The day after you kissed me I went to your place. I wanted to talk to you about it but your dad told me you were gone. You were meant to leave a week later or something but had asked to leave early. I didn't get it then but I don't know after you explained everything."

He cupped my cheeks brushing away the tears I didn't even know had fallen "I'm sorry, why didn't you say anything. So many times I picked up my phone but I thought you would do better without me. I was no good."

I could see the tears gathered in his eyes "I would have done better with you, how can your bad boy streak be worse than Jamie's. Sorry, lame joke." Jackson choked back a laugh "there were days I wanted to call you, you weren't the only one with my number but Bobby would often talk about you. I know you two kept in contact and he would tell me what you were up to, what you were doing, your friends or who you were seeing. When I heard you were getting on with life I just thought I wouldn't see you so I pushed our good memories away and I got close to Jamie. I used to like Jamie but I did feel something for you. I hated it to be honest liking you both when you were related. I used that to justify my crush on both of you. You were related and similar that is why I liked you both. Jamie became an ass and didn't talk to me. My crush on him was nearly over. Then you kissed me, I had wanted to kiss you back, instead, you pulled away from me. I don't want you to feel bad or upset you but I want to explain my feelings as well."

Jackson nodded sadly "I should have talked to you before I left, explained everything that was happening. I'm sorry I screwed up back then."

I agreed "you didn't screw up maybe you gave us a better chance. If we had got together back then who says we would have still been together. Hell, you could be in jail or have a child of your own. You did the right thing for you and I'm proud you did that. What you did took so much strength."

Jackson kissed me holding his lips against mine for longer than previously "now we have talked about Danny and Bobby, my cousin and then me coming back that leaves us with me and you, US."

I smiled at him as he again placed his lips against mine "well us...how long since we started doing this. Two weeks or something? I don't know I'm confused about it all."

I pulled Jax's sheets higher over my body trying to hide "we have been doing this for four, five years. My time away didn't change anything for me. I want nothing more than to hold you I my arms every morning or to go to bed at night time holding your body so close to mine that I can't tell my arms and legs from yours. I want nothing more than to be with you for a long while."

I didn't bother holding back the tears now "I want the same thing, I want to be with you every chance I get. When we aren't together I'm either thinking about you or missing you. I have loved all of the time I have spent with you and I never want to be separated from you for any extended periods. I really like you."

Jackson cuddled into my neck, I could feel as his body warmly wrapped around mine "I really like you. I never thought you would give me a chance to say those words. I now want to spend everyday showing you how much if you would let me."

I kissed his chin "let me think about it for a moment." I tapped my fingers against my chin acting as though I needed to think about it "yeah I guess I want the same thing. I just hope you know you're stuck with me for a long while."

Jackson laughed "couldn't think of anything better than that Matilda."

I asked unsure about Jackson's response "what does that mean for us? What are we or what do we mean to each other?"

He ran his hands up my back gently massaging the skin that was wound so tight from stress. Jackson declared "I want you to be mine and only mine. I don't like to share with anyone."

I laughed at his eagerness "was there a question in there because I personally would like to be asked."

Jackson joked "so would I to be honest. I'm only joking a little bit. Matilda, will you go out with me exclusively and be my girlfriend?"

I nodded my head kissing his lips "yes snuggle bunny I would love to be your girlfriend. Although I feel you also need to know I do not like to share and I have no intention in sharing you with anyone."

Jackson laughed against my lips "I'm glad you don't like sharing we have another thing in common. Now we need to talk about Bobby. How are you going to tell him we are together?"

I gasped "me, I have to tell my brother we are dating. We are in the relationship together. Me and you champ so all for one or none for all. We are in this relationship together until the end."