Chapter 18

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My eyes open slowly. Too much light. Blinding. They close again. A warm hand holds mine.

"Kaitlyn, baby! Open your eyes, please," his voice. God if I'm dead, then death is cruel.

"Zack," it hurts to speak. My voice feels raw and painful, but I whisper the word nevertheless.

"I'm here, Kaitlyn! Hold on! You're going to be ok! Just hold on for me!" he says.

Everything fades once more.

When I come around the second time, things are a little less incoherent. I open my eyes slowly.

The room is dark. I'm lying on a bed, a needle... no an IV tube in my arm. My stomach feels sore and the skin feels pulled and tight. I look around the room slowly, and my eyes settled on Zack. He sits next to me in a chair, his head tilted to the side and his eyes closed.

I watch him for a long time. His hand holds mine even in his sleep. He looks tired. I don't know how long I watch him for, but it's a long time and not long enough. I can't explain the joy and happiness I feel in those minutes or even hours that I watch him sleeping. The love that swells in my heart is almost too much to bear.

As if finally sensing he's being watched, his eyes open and he looks into mine silently.
Neither of us say a word. Neither of us move and then slowly, he sits forward and using his free hand, trails his fingertips down the side of my face in a soft caress.

"Forgive me," he says gently.

"For what?" I ask. A look of pain crosses his face.

"For saying those things I said to you that night. For letting you go," he forces out.

"Did you let me go, Zack?" I asks gently. He closes his eyes and bows his head.

"Kaitlyn," he whispers, his voice breaks.

I tug his hand gently and he moves without further encouragement. He sits on the end of the bed and buries his face against my shoulder and neck.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I was so angry... I thought I'd lost you," he growls.

I wrap my arms around him slowly, cautious of my sore stomach. He's careful to, I noted. He makes sure he keeps his weight off me and using one of his hands, he braces one arm on the side of the bed to hold himself up.

"Zack, it's ok. I was angry too. We needed to sort it out, but not in the way we did. We should've been more up front about it all. I take a lot of the blame," I say.

Using one hand to thread into his hair, I hold his head to me, "I love you," I whisper.

"I love you too, Kaitlyn. And I promise you, I'll never doubt you again. I'll never hurt you again. Just promise to never leave me," he begs.

His hands frame my face and I try to blink back the tears that quickly fill my eyes.

"I promise," my lip trembles and he rubs his thumb over my bottom lip.

"Don't cry," he mumbles, but I can't help it. After everything that has happened, after everything we've been through, I can't help it. The tears fall and he kisses each one away. His lips move over my skin, slowly going up and down my jaw. Finally, he takes my lips in a delicate kiss that leaves me weak, makes my love for him just that much more. His hands tangle in my hair and his lips move slowly toward my neck.

"I missed you," he whispers as he nips at the delicate skin at the nape of my neck. I shiver.

"How long have I been out?"

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