A Rock and a Hard Place

After the Show

I tighten the laces of the palm tree juke Creepers on my feet and stand straight. I shake my limbs out before I take the bass guitar that the technician, Marty, gives me.

"There's, like, the craziest energy right now," he says, smiling.

"And it's all kinetic," I answer, returning the grin.

I turn to the front of the trailer, where Juan and Eric stand just outside. Juan's guitar is already strapped on and Eric's finishing getting hooked up to his in-ear system. Knowing the bass isn't over the speakers yet I give it a few good strums, hearing the feedback in my ear. I slightly tune my A string, but otherwise it's perfect. I nod at Marty and walk forward.

Out of the metal interior of the set trailer, I hear the sound of Black Veil Brides playing on the twin mainstage next door. I smile as I hear the final chorus of "In the End" playing and realize how close I am to playing Warped Tour's mainstage for the first time. It's all happening.

Juan turns to me as he spots me, and Eric stays talking to a girl who happens to be backstage. The stage manager calls a two minute warning. Due to psychic connection Juan comments, "This moment is like, happening, dude."

I bob my head side to side and smile, making him chuckle at my dumb head dance. "We're about to headline Warped Tour, dude."

"It's not headlining if we're not closing," Eric says, not even turning.

"We're playing mainstage, dickhead. We're headlining," Juan barks back, gently pushing the drummer with his shoulder. This finally pulls Eric's attention to us and he smiles as he joins the triangle. Juan puts his arms up and over our shoulders, and we follow and lean in to touch our foreheads together.

"This is it," I say. "Don't fuck it up."

"Encouraging," Eric deadpans, but he smiles. "I'm gonna' do great."

Juan remarks, "Always the team player."

And then there's no noise from the next stage, other than the cheers of an adoring crowd bidding farewell to their favorite band. There's a pause, and then the stage manager is calling for us to head out. We pull apart and line up, Eric first, then Juan, then me. Marty and Pete give us "good luck"s from the trailer and Monica is already back behind the drum riser, ready to pull a replacement drumstick and do readjustments as needed since Eric beats the shit out of his drum kit. I feel my chest get tight with anxiety, but it morphs into excitement and butterflies.

Then we're walking, Eric first, then Juan with a three second delay, and as I'm about to walk I feel a hot hand around my arm. I turn quickly to face my boyfriend, his bare chest sweaty from his performance and the run backstage to catch me in time. "If you think you're playing your first mainstage Warped show without a kiss from me you're dead wrong." Andy grins.

I smile and throw my arms around his neck before I kiss him hard. He squeezes me to him, lifting me off the ground slightly, but puts me down quickly. I don't need words when I smile back at him and run onstage.

My mic is a little high, so I readjust it as I tell the audience, "You guys better fucking dance!" The crowd shouts back, and with four taps from Eric the three of us start in sync. It doesn't matter how many times we rehearse it, but I always smile when it happens. I start singing, "Run / past the rivers and run / past the seas..."*

It feels like a mere half of a minute passes when the song ends. I couldn't dream of a better reaction from the crowd, who sang every word and who screams back at us when the final chord ends. My smile is so wide it almost hurts, and I look at Juan who mirrors me.

"Thank you, Pomona!" I call, and they respond kindly. I hold the mic as I introduce us. "We are L.A. Ghouls and we're very excited to be with you today." Small pause for applause. "This next one's called 'Get Bent.'"** Another four clicks and we all start in sync again, Juan and I ready at our mics.